Let's Play Fighting Fantasy #8: Scorpion Swamp

[Guyr Adamantine]

I'm getting Quasimodo vibes from this dude. Greet him!

[Username17]

It's greeting time.

-Username17

[Darth Rabbitt]

"I am a fighter on a quest," you reply. Your ring is not warning you of evil, so you feel safe speaking to the Master of Frogs. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies is in the service of Selator.)

You tell the Master of Frogs about the plant for which you are searching. "Ah, yes," he says. "I did not know there were any of those plants left. They are no good to me, though, for I am Neutral, and only Good wizards may use that plant. Why should I help you?" Will you:

Threaten him with your sword?
Cast a Fear spell on him?
Cast a Friendship spell on him?
Offer him a Golden Magnet as a bribe?
Offer him an Amulet belonging to one of the other Masters as a bribe?
Offer him a huge Violet Jewel as a bribe?

[Korgan0]

Threatening sounds like a bad idea. Jewel?

[Winnah]

I hate these filthy Neutrals. With enemies you know where they stand but with Neutrals, who knows? It sickens me.

Draw your sword and prepare to continue the epic struggle between good and neutral.

[Dr_Noface]

offer him the violet jewel, we don't need it

[Darth Rabbitt]

You reach into your pack and offer him the great Violet Jewel that you took from the head of the creature in the pool. He smiles broadly, looking more like a Frog than ever. "All right," he says, "That's a good enough reason for me!" He takes the jewel.

The Master of Frogs hops down off his mushroom and reaches into the pool. He brings up a handful of water. It does not run between his fingers, but stays in his hand. He molds it between his fingers and it turns into a Crystal Ball. He gazes into it for a while, murmuring to himself. Then he tosses it back into the pool. "The plant you seek is directly to the north," he tells you. "But the way is not straight, and there are many dangers. Beware of my brother Masters, for not all of them are friendly. And be kind to the Giant." With those words, he jumps straight up, and vanishes in the trees. The clearing is empty.

(Actually pretty useful advice. Once you befriend them, the Neutral Masters are pretty cool guys, even though they probably does afraid of Fear spells.)

The only exit from the clearing is the path you took to get there. You travel north, towards the place where a short time ago you fought the Swamp Orcs. You grasp your sword, in case you have to fight again.

You are in the clearing where you met the Swamp Orcs. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies slew them.)

You have a choice of three exits from this clearing. Will you go:

North?
South?
West?

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 12/20
LUCK 9/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: None
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Bless x 1, Fire x 1, Skill x 1, Stamina x 2
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^?
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A Thief's picnic site. The Thief carries a Red Cloak.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The nest of an Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of Slime.
29: Home of a wounded Unicorn, with two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) tucked away.
32: The home of a Giant Scorpion eating a Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

[Guyr Adamantine]

I don't know if we can trust these filthy neutrals, but we have no other leads. To the north!

[Starmaker]

We've got a long way to go, there may be fuck-you locations, and we're wounded. Let's go all the way west and try to heal that unicorn, maybe it'll heal us back.

[Username17]

Let us first detour to the unicorn and bless it.

-Username17

[Dr_Noface]

I vote unicorn bless detour, dead dwarf detour, and thief (with a possible red cloak quest item) detour.

[Darth Rabbitt]

(OK, so go heal the Unicorn is our next goal.)

After a short walk, you enter a pleasant, grassy clearing. You see two other exits. This is Clearing 24. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has been here before.)

You recognize the spot where you were attacked by the Crab Grass. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies killed the Crab Grass.)

There are three exits from the clearing. Will you go:

South?
East?
West?

(I assume West, if we want to reach the Unicorn.)

The knotted trees give way before you and you enter another clearing. This is Clearing 5. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) You realize immediately that there has been a battle here. The ground is torn up; blood is splashed over the dank swamp-grass, and you can see two arrows sticking in a tree not far away.

Do you examine the clearing to see what you can find or decide to leave as quickly as possible?

(I assume we leave for the Unicorn.)

There are three paths leading out of the clearing. The one that leads east is somewhat narrower and darker than the others. Will you go:

North?
East?
West?

(West leads to Unicorn.)

The path dips slightly downwards and leads into a grassy clearing. This is Clearing 29. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) In the middle of the clearing lies a white creature. At first you think it is a horse, but when it turns to face you, you realize that it is a UNICORN. It appears to be wounded; great claw marks score its flank. But it gets to its feet and lowers its horn at you, snorting a challenge. Will you:

Run away?
Fight it?
Cast a Friendship spell?
Cast a Fear spell?
Cast a Bless spell?
Cast a Fire spell?

(I assume we cast Bless.)

You do not want to attack the injured Unicorn; you have always heard that they are good creatures. You cast the Bless spell, instead. The creature quivers as the spell strikes it. Then it whinnies joyfully. The wounds along its side are almost healed, and the Unicorn is much stronger. It is still reluctant to approach a human, but it walks over to the side of the clearing and digs at the ground with its horn. Then it looks at you and walks away. You look at the ground where it had been digging. There are two Magic Gems there, like the ones Selator gave you. You recognize one as a Friendship Spell and one as a spell to restore LUCK. You are certain that the Unicorn can understand you as you thank it and go on your way.

There are four exits. Will you go:

North?
South?
East?
West?

(I assume we head to the north of the swamp, but I don't know which path north we wish to take. The one that leads to the Fog, just north of the Unicorn, the one that probably leads to the Thief, which is one clearing to the east and then north, or the north path all the way east that we definitely haven't been to before, the one that's just north of the field where we fought the Swamp Orcs.)

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 12/20
LUCK 9/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: None
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Friendship x 1, Fire x 1, Skill x 1, Stamina x 2, Luck x 1
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^?
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v.........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A Thief's picnic site. The Thief carries a Red Cloak.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The nest of an Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of Slime.
29: Home of a healed Unicorn, which gives out two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) as a reward.
32: The home of a Giant Scorpion eating a Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

[Dr_Noface]

I vote thief. Maybe cast SKILL if his skill was above 9.

[Darth Rabbitt]

(The Thief was SKILL 10 STAMINA 9. A Stamina spell would probably be useful, and will definitely use it, but if you're not sure on the Skill spell then I'll save it.)

The knotted trees give way before you and you enter another clearing. This is Clearing 5. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has been here before.)

You see few signs of the earlier battle. The bodies of the Orcs have gone. A foot-long Scorpion glares at you from a pool as you hurry through the clearing.

There are three paths leading out of the clearing. The one that leads east is somewhat narrower and darker than the others. Will you go:

North?
East?
West?

(I assume we head north here to reach the thief.)

You enter a rather pleasant glade surrounded by gnarled oaks. You are in Clearing 9. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) Leaning against a tree, eating lunch, is a small, cheerful man in dark clothes. His food is in a picnic basket. He has no visible weapons, except the knife with which he is cutting his cheese. He notices you standing there and hails you. "Good day, fighter, will you share my meal?" As he speaks, you feel the Brass Ring grow hot, warning you of evil. You realize that the man is a THIEF. Will you:

Attack him?
Ignore him?
Accept his invitation and sit down?

(I assume we attack, like last time.)

You hear a hiss of anger and the Thief is upon you. He has only a dagger, but he fights viciously.

THIEF SKILL 10 STAMINA 9

You may not escape, for the Thief is attacking you furiously.

Combat Log:

Thief 14, Ilot Dome 17. Thief is at 7.
Thief 18, Ilot Dome 13. Ilot Dome is at 18.
Thief 14, Ilot Dome 19. Thief is at 5.
Thief 22, Ilot Dome 16. Ilot Dome is at 16.
Thief 21, Ilot Dome 14. Ilot Dome is at 14.
Thief 19, Ilot Dome 13. Ilot Dome is at 12.
Thief 15, Ilot Dome 16. Thief is at 3.
Thief 19, Ilot Dome 16. Ilot Dome is at 10.
Thief 15, Ilot Dome 19. Thief is at 1.
Thief 19, Ilot Dome 17. Ilot Dome is at 8.
Thief 18, Ilot Dome 20. Thief is dead.

(We got fucked up pretty bad, due to poor rolls. Do we want to cast our other Stamina spell?)

The body of the Thief lies at your feet. He was not as clever as he thought he was! You examine his pack. The only thing that you find that looks useful is a large Red Cloak, which you may add to your possessions if you like. (I assume we do.) Munching a bit of cheese you took from his picnic basket, you continue on your way.

There are three paths leading away from the clearing. The northern one seems to slope downwards. Will you go:

North?
South?
East?

(I assume we head East and then North, to the bridge.)

You can see that ahead of you two other paths join yours in a small clearing. You are in Clearing 13. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) You feel a prickling sensation around your Brass Ring. Looking down, you see dozens of small SCORPIONS scuttling towards you. Test your Luck. (2,5=7; Lucky!)

Your reactions are quick. You have time to decide how to deal with the Scorpions. Will you:

Stamp on them and strike with your sword?
Cast a Fire Spell?
Leap over them to safety?

(Do we want to cast any or all of the spells to restore our stats? And how will we take care of them after that has been decided?)

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 8/20
LUCK 8/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: Red Cloak
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Friendship x 1, Fire x 1, Skill x 1, Stamina x 1, Luck x 1
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v.........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown, and now gone.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A dead Thief's former picnic site. The Thief carried a Red Cloak, which is now ours.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The nest of an Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of Slime.
29: Home of a healed Unicorn, which gives out two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) as a reward.
32: The home of a Giant Scorpion eating a Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

[Dr_Noface]

I vote stamina spell, and fire, just to see what it does.

[Username17]

Burninate!

-Username17

[Omegonthesane]

I concur with demands for fire-based scorpion cookery.

[Darth Rabbitt]

So then, it's time for Cooking With Scorpions.)

You know that the only magic likely to help you against the crawling multitude is a Fire spell. Quickly, you cast it. A ring of fire blooms in the grass around your feet. It spreads for a moment and then goes out, but the Scorpions have been driven back. You dash out of the clearing before they can attack you again.

(Aww, it doesn't kill them for reals? Still better than what it did to the Sword Trees.)

Hurriedly, you choose an exit. Will you go:

North?
East?
West?

(I assume North.)

Ahead of you there is an opening in the trees. You investigate. You are in Clearing 35. You can see the wide Foulbrood River, running east and west. A great stone bridge crosses the river. It looks totally deserted.

Do you go on to the bridge or do you distrust the bridge and rather turn around?

(We know it's safe from prior experience.)

The bridge is old but in good repair. (I'm assuming we choose to go north, as going south would be identical to not having crossed the bridge at all.)

You are in a clearing where one huge tree rises from the hard, bare ground. In the tree is a gigantic nest made of sticks. You are in Clearing 16. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) You stop to look at the great nest. Then you hear a rushing of wings behind you. A huge EAGLE is hovering over the clearing, watching you. Do you have:

Some Parrot Feathers?
A silver Bird Amulet?
Neither of these?

The Eagle lands on a branch of the tree and watches you. Its gaze is fierce, and its great hooked beak opens and closes threateningly.

Do you attack it or back away cautiously?

(We know that we can leave it be. But do we count it as a mutual enemy?)

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 18/20
LUCK 8/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: Red Cloak
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Friendship x 1, Skill x 1, Luck x 1
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v.........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown, and now gone.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A dead Thief's former picnic site. The Thief carried a Red Cloak, which is now ours.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions. Fire repels them but does not kill them.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The nest of an Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of Slime.
29: Home of a healed Unicorn, which gives out two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) as a reward.
32: The home of a Giant Scorpion eating a Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

[Omegonthesane]

Everyone that isn't a friend is a mutual enemy. Attack!

[Darth Rabbitt]

The Eagle knows that you are an enemy and attacks. You have no chance to escape, for it is larger and faster than you. You must trust your sword.

EAGLE SKILL 7 STAMINA 6

(I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies, speaking to the Eagle.)

Combat Log:

Eagle 18, Ilot Dome 19. Eagle is at 4.
Eagle 17, Ilot Dome 14. Ilot Dome is at 16.
Eagle 11, Ilot Dome 14. Eagle is at 2.
Eagle 13, Ilot Dome 17. Eagle is dead.

(Not too shabby, even if it wasn't a flawless since the Eagle got crazy good rolls early on.)

You have killed the Eagle.

Would you like to climb up and examine its nest or leave now?

(I assume we loot its nest for that sweet Eagle bling.)

Test your Luck. (3,4=7; Lucky!) If you are Unlucky, you fall down, losing 2 STAMINA points, but you climb back up to the nest. If you are Lucky, you get to the nest safely. Looped around one of the branches you find a heavy Gold Chain; you may take it if you wish. You climb down and leave.

You have no reason to linger. You have a choice of three paths. Will you travel:

South?
East?
West?

(Our LUCK is getting low, do we want to cast our Luck spell now? Also, do we head to Willowbend to rest for 2 STAMINA and cash in our Spider Amulet and Gold Chain for some Spells? We know we can befriend the Brigands, and the Slime is easily avoided and/or taken care of. Or do we want to fuck that shit and try to accomplish our mission with no more detours?)

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 16/20
LUCK 7/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: Red Cloak, Gold Chain
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Friendship x 1, Skill x 1, Luck x 1
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v.........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown, and now gone.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A dead Thief's former picnic site. The Thief carried a Red Cloak, which is now ours.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions. Fire repels them but does not kill them.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The former nest of a dead Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain that is now ours.
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of Slime.
29: Home of a healed Unicorn, which gives out two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) as a reward.
32: The home of a Giant Scorpion eating a Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

EDIT: forgot to add the Gold Chain to our Adventure Sheet.

[Whatever]

More spells! Stamina would be nice.

[Darth Rabbitt]

(That would take us West.)

The trail takes you to a small open spot where, years ago, a great tree fell and dragged down several others. This is Clearing 32. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) As you approach, you hear the sound of fighting. You step round a tree to see a GIANT SCORPION fighting a Dwarf who is wearing leather armor. The Dwarf is in trouble. As you rush towards the fight, the Scorpion catches the Dwarf's neck in one of its claws and throws him to the ground, where he lies still. You doubt that you have any magic spells which would be worth using on this enemy.

Do you leave the clearing while the monster feasts on the Dwarf, or attack the Giant Scorpion?

(There is no fucking way that the Giant Scorpion that's attacking a Dwarf is not a mutual enemy. Should we metagame and leave it be, since we can't Bless that Dwarf?)

[Korgan0]

Yeah, get outta here.

[Dr_Noface]

i told you guys we should have taken a second bless. we will avenge you dwarf!

[Darth Rabbitt]

(Hmm. 1 to attack, 1 to run. Well, there's a good chance the Scorpion will be gone if we don't kill it now, so I'll go with attack, since this is clearly a Mutual Enemy.)

The Giant Scorpion lifts its claws menacingly. It is not badly wounded. Evidently the Dwarf was not a very skilled fighter.

GIANT SCORPION SKILL 9 STAMINA 10

Combat Log:

Scorpion 18, Ilot Dome 19. Scorpion is at 8.
Scorpion 12, Ilot Dome 16. Scorpion is at 6.
Scorpion 15, Ilot Dome 17. Scorpion is at 4.
Scorpion 14, Ilot Dome 17. Scorpion is at 2.
Scorpion 16, Ilot Dome 19. Scorpion is dead.

(About fucking time we got a Flawless, after all the shitty rolls against the Mutual Enemies we destroyed.)

The monster is dead. You look at the Dwarf. He does not seem to be breathing. Will you:

Leave the clearing immediately?
Use a Bless spell on the Dwarf?
Search the body of the Dwarf?

(We know the Potion won't help us, so I assume we leave the body be.)

You leave the clearing.

Do you go north or east?

(I imagine we go north, to get to Willowbend.)

You find yourself at a crossing of paths. Which way will you go?

North?
South?
East?
West?

(I assume west, once more to reach Willowbend.)

The path widens into another clearing. You are in Clearing 15. You see that there is one other path leading out. Then, off to the side, you see a dim glow. It is a ball of dancing light, or WILL-O'-THE-WISP. It hovers at the western edge of the clearing, and then hovers back a few meters. You can now see what may be another path, somewhat murky and overgrown, where the Will-o'-the-wisp is dancing. It seems to want to show you something. Will you follow it, or go on?

Follow it to the west
Ignore it and go south
Ignore it and go east

(I imagine we ignore it and go south, onwards to Willowbend.)

You are in a particularly marshy area. The ground squishes under your feet. The path bends slightly and runs alongside a large pool. You can see that there is one other exit from this clearing. You are in Clearing 28. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) The surface of the pool ripples nastily, and green slime coats the water. You would never drink out of this pool, you are sure! Suddenly the scum on top of the pool seems to pull together. To your amazement, it heaves itself out of the water and on to the path, blocking your way. It is a viscous lump of SLIME, two meters wide, which gives off a fetid odor as it oozes slowly towards you. Will you:

Run away?
Try to jump over it?
Attack with your sword?
Use a Fire spell?
Use a Ice spell?
Use a Wither spell?

(We know we can sword it, so I assume we do so.)

The Slime is very strong, but almost mindless.

SLIME SKILL 5 STAMINA 17

Combat Log:

Slime 10, Ilot Dome 18. Slime is at 15.
Slime 13, Ilot Dome 17. Slime is at 13.
Slime 7, Ilot Dome 18. Slime is at 11.
Slime 15, Ilot Dome 16. Slime is at 9.
Slime 13, Ilot Dome 14. Slime is at 7.
Slime 7, Ilot Dome 12. Slime is at 5.
Slime 12, Ilot Dome 16. Slime is at 3.
Slime 13, Ilot Dome 15. Slime is at 1.
Slime 16, Ilot Dome 20. Slime is dead.

(Another Flawless. Fuck yeah.)

The Slime is dead; its remains melt and putrefy while you are watching. The smell is unbearable.

You leave the clearing as quickly as possible.

Do you go north or go west?

(I assume we go west, to reach the Brigands.)

The trail winds about, but you keep to it faithfully. Skirting a great shelf-fungus and the tiny creatures dining on it, you approach another clearing. This is Clearing 10. (I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies has not been here before.) You can hear the sound of voices ahead of you. Cautiously, you peer round a tree. You see a group of five men, you guess they are BRIGANDS from their dress and rough speech. The Brass Ring is not warm, so you know that these men are not really evil. On the other hand, there is no need to be foolish. Will you:

Turn around and go back the way you came?
Charge out at them, shouting and waving your sword?
Cast a Curse spell from your hiding place?
Cast a Fear spell from your hiding place?
Cast an Illusion spell from your hiding place?
Cast a Friendship spell from your hiding place?
Step out confidently and greet them?

(So do we want to use our Friendship spell this time?)

I Live Only to Destroy our Mutual Enemies
SKILL 9/10
STAMINA 16/20
LUCK 7/11
Equipment: Sword, Chainmail, Brass Ring
Backpack: Red Cloak, Gold Chain
Amulets: Spider Amulet
Spells: Friendship x 1, Skill x 1, Luck x 1
Map:
[W]....[15]<-[X]
..^........v......^
[10]<-[28]...[32]<-[16]
..............................^
..........[33]->[20]..[35]
............^.......v.......^
..........FOG....[9]->[13]
............^......^
..........[29]->[5]->[24]->[26]
............^...............v.........v
..........[18]...........[17].....[8]
............^...............v
..........[34].............v
............^...............v
...........[4]<-[1]<-[12]->[25]
(Key: Ignore ellipses.)

1: Crossroads and entrance/exit to/from Scorpion Swamp.
4: The now-friendly Master of Wolves' house, where he yiffs lives with his two Wolves.
5: A former battleground. Contents unknown, and now gone.
8: The home of the Master of Frogs. He likes Violet Jewels.
9: A dead Thief's former picnic site. The Thief carried a Red Cloak, which is now ours.
10: An encampment of surprisingly friendly Brigands.
12: A tree hollow that is the home of a now dead Bear. It has no loot.
13: A clearing filled with Scorpions. Fire repels them but does not kill them.
15: Home of some Will-o'-the-wisps.
16: The former nest of a dead Eagle, with a perfectly lootable Gold Chain that is now ours.
17: The abode of the now-dead Master of Spiders, and his Spider Amulet.
18: Home of the dreaded Sword Trees. Fire is not very effective against them.
20: A cliff overlooking a river.
24: A patch of freshly cut Crab Grass.
25: The home of the recently slain Pool Beast. It had a Violet Jewel embedded in its forehead that has been looted.
26: The home of some recently killed Swamp Orcs, whose bows cost you a SKILL point if you don't have a Golden Magnet Charm.
28: A pool of dead Slime.
29: Home of a healed Unicorn, which gives out two Spell Gems (Luck and Friendship) as a reward.
32: The home of a dead Giant Scorpion that had been eating an equally dead Dwarf, carrying a Potion to make Dwarves Handsome (that is detrimental to humans.)
33: A riverbank.
34. A stream, which can be frozen.
35: A bridge which is safe to cross.
W: The town of Willowbend. The Bent Spear is a good place to stay, restoring 2 STAMINA.
X: A crossroads.
FOG: Poisonous fog that deals 2 STAMINA damage when walked through.

EDIT: In the world's worst copypasta mistake ever I forgot an entire section with the Will-o-the-wisps. I assumed we ignored them, but forgot to put that in.