It's Personal...

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Mon Jan 26, 2015 4:17 am

It's Ausfailia Day, to celebrate... something. Being a country, I guess?

Anyway, I thought I'd celebrate it in a very unAustralian way:
*Watching the WWE Royal Rumble (the great American dream)
*Drinking Somersby cider (Somersby being the kind of region in Britain where you don't say cider, you say soidurr)
*Eating apple pie (probably made here, but associated with America and Scandiwegia)

A friend then pointed out that drinking alcohol, eating pies and watching shirtless men fight is basically the most Australian thing you can possibly do. FOILED AGAIN!

Also this soidurr is strong, I should review a book or something.

Whipstitch · Post by **Whipstitch** » Mon Jan 26, 2015 4:32 am

The rumble was an incredible exercise in trolling, I'll give it that.

We've reached a point where the fucking Miz is one of the wrasslers I appreciate most on the roster. Think about that. Soak it in.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Mon Jan 26, 2015 5:13 am

Any rpgs from Australia?

Oh! Review Mutants Down Under.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Mon Jan 26, 2015 9:29 am

I don't have that. Anyway, I just decided to have a 4-5 hour nap instead. It was awesome.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Tue Jan 27, 2015 7:42 pm

So, my computer has recently succumbed to a large amount of nasty viruses, to the point that the only way to fix it is to purge everything and reset it. This means that I'm going to lose all my files, games, and practically everything I've ever had stored on there.

I've not been having a good track record with technology lately.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Wed Jan 28, 2015 12:01 am

The New England area has been having it's ass handed to it by a blizzard, to the effect that several states (New York, Connecticut and Massachusetts, maybe others) have declared states of emergencies. Roads are closed, there's a travel ban, nothing is open, emergency services are at the ready, power outages expected, stay indoors, hoard up on food, all that good stuff.

So far we've gotten eighteen inches of powdery fluff and mild winds. We was promised at least two feet. Hell, Charlie Baker was saying that this blizzard would be a top 5 historic blizzard. They were making comparisons to the blizzard of '78, for crying out loud!

'Course, it wouldn't be the first time a Republican's been wrong, but still... I was expecting more from Blizzard Juno (yes, they named it). I feel cheated.

Count Arioch the 28th · Wed Jan 28, 2015 1:20 am

Jamaica cruise was fucking epic... more as I process it...

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Thu Jan 29, 2015 12:04 am

My grandfather has Alzheimer's. I mean, this is something we've suspected for awhile now, but just today we got confirmation from a doctor, and it's not news you really want to hear. We're going to look for a home care assistant to look after him during the day, but it's looking very likely that we'll have to move him into a nursing home.

It's gonna be a long, hard weekend.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 1:10 am

http://imgur.com/a/MDomc#0

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 4:45 am

Ok, so I'm tired of begging for and being denied positions and being poor, and as much as I want to take the Bender route*, I know it's unlikely I'd be able to go directly from unemployed to owning my own business at all, let alone successfully.

So, much like I have asked for input on characters, mechanics, and PC Builds, I want people on the Den to help me optimize my job hunting.

This is the resume I've been using. I've been told I interview well, and I tend to only apply for stuff I have directly related experience for. I'm aware that one page resumes are better, and on the advice of a staffing agency that hasn't found anything for me, I did make this, which does fit on one page in Word since the .doc version has the skills in two columns and the refences in four columns.

I've been told I interview well, but tips in that arena would be appreciate too. I'm just really tired of living with my parents and having all my worldly belongings confined to a 9x12 bedroom or strewn about the garage/shed/storage locker in boxes.

*

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 5:16 am

I am only sure that I am competent at writing legal resumes. However that being said, I would through your goddam resume in the trash without reading it.

1) It is a one page fucking resume, it doesn't need a goddam summary.
2) That summary that shouldn't exist better not take me more than one line to find out anything besides that you have a four year degree in who gives a shit it isn't relevant. Your's does.
3) It will be one page. There will be no two page resumes. Especially not garbage ones. I've seen people summarize clerking for the supreme Court of the State in one line on their one page resume, why the fuck do you need so much space for so little shit? (One reason, you have a summary, which just states a bunch of stuff that is elsewhere on the resume).
4) Formatting: I would either put the name stuff on top, so it takes up less room, and you don't waste all the space on the left, or alternatively, make it into a corner square, so that you don't waste all that space on the left.
5) Your skills list is again a waste of my fucking time, you are telling me that you have some experience in most of those lines, you also have actual fucking jobs that show that experience, so why the fuck do I care about your skill at having experience that I am going to read in 6 seconds.
7) Some of your entries under experience are tabbed over and some are not, that should take 1/8th of a second for you to notice that is a fucking problem and needs to be fixed.
8) Make one or more resumes that are different. Anyone who cares about your Web editing gives zero shits about your cooking. Anyone who cares about your cooking gives zero shits about your Web editing. Send the right resume to the right people.

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 5:18 am

One page is better. Nix the summary, no one cares. Move your name/address to the right hand corner. Nix the skills, unless they're immediately relevant to the job and not reflected in your experience or education. Leave out references unless they ask for them in the job ad - you can always say on the cover letter that they're available on request.

When tailoring a resume to a job, you want to emphasize your most relevant abilities first - if that's education, then education goes first; if that's experience, then relative jobs go first. Try and narrow down and quantify the accomplishments at your job - managed X people, responsible for $X ad space/equipment, that sort of thing.

fectin · Post by **fectin** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 5:54 am

I don't know what things you're applying for. It's possible that this is optimized for your local area and/or specific field.

Otherwise, I can't pick out anything you're trying to say with those resumes. What are you good at that someone who hires people would care about? Lead with that. Maybe try something like: "Hard-working student with kitchen and retail management experience looking for opportunity in ____. Flexible schedule; willing to work nights/early mornings." (except make it accurate). Definitely tone down your willingness to work odd hours. It comes across too strong, doesn't gain you anything, and takes up a big chunk of your pitch.

Look at your skill list from the same perspective: you've been a manager; which of those skills would matter to you?

Order your experience by topic, not chronologically. So all the separate retails group together and get a single line unless they're notable. "Management" and "restaurant" are probably the other groups, though you could combine them and pull together a reasonable pitch for "Sales" out of what you have. Put them in order of importance (most to least).

Pick a name and stick with it. If you go by Brencis at work, delete Korbl (or vice versa).

A one-page resume is not usually a requirement, but the first page is all anyone is likely to look at. Also, you don't have enough experience to need two pages.

Don't take this too hard; you've got some good stuff there and probably just need to present it better.

edit: Quantify things wherever you can. How many employees did you manage, etc.

Aharon · Post by **Aharon** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 10:20 am

I recently was linked to http://www.selfmaderenegade.net/, the webpage of a college dropout who made a business out of coaching people with liberal arts degrees to get out of sucky jobs. The price tag for coaching is hefty for unemployed (~250$/month), but as far as I can tell, the free advice he posts on his website isn't bad.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 11:00 am

Ok, so I haven't looked at selfmaderenegade yet, but here's what I have based on Kaelik and AH's advice-
Culinary
Journalism
Retail

and I may redo my "master" resume as a generic sales position resume on Fectin's advice.

fectin · Post by **fectin** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 5:02 pm

Those are much better, especially the Retail and Journalism versions.

I might suggest putting your store management and ad sales blocks at the bottom of the culinary one as well, because you have space to fill there and they seem the most broadly applicable/bragworthy.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 8:23 pm

Makes sense.

On the name thing, what's the best way to handle that? I've got my legal name (Brencis) and my go by name (Korbl), and I never know how to handle that in an interview/resume.

Count Arioch the 28th · Sun Feb 01, 2015 10:18 pm

I typically use legal when applying, then when I get the job I tell them what I prefer to be called if I can be arsed (If I don't intend to work someplace for very long I don't tell them what I like to go by typically.)

Post by **fbmf** » Sun Feb 01, 2015 10:59 pm

Count Arioch the 28th wrote:I typically use legal when applying, then when I get the job I tell them what I prefer to be called if I can be arsed (If I don't intend to work someplace for very long I don't tell them what I like to go by typically.)

This.

Game On,
fbmf

AndreiChekov · Post by **AndreiChekov** » Mon Feb 09, 2015 5:40 am

My brother was married today. It is all very exciting, so I thought I'd let everyone know.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Tue Feb 10, 2015 6:25 am

I hate this shit.

Right now I've got adrenaline coursing through me because of stupid internet confrontations. The feeling is uncomfortable, and knowing it's over stupid internet bullshit just makes me feel like a childish idiot.

I only have a handful of people on here set to ignore, and it's usually because their posts are so bizarre or mind-numbingly offensive that doing so is the only defense against my own inclination to read what's in front of me. On facebook, I've deleted people when it became clear that their personality and mine just would match about as well as potassium and a giant glass of water if I continued being "friends" with them, but I've never felt the need to block someone.

But this "friend" of mine had some stupid grudge against the paper at my college, the staff of which I was a part of for two years and am very proud of. I have very few things in my life that I can really feel proud about, but even though we, and especially I, made mistakes, I am proud of my work on the paper, and of the staff I worked with. He took shots at the paper, calling it unprofessional, claiming factual inaccuracies, claiming we were lazy and bad reporters, all kinds of stupid bullshit. So the last time he did, like a week ago, I'd had enough and said he was banned from talking about the paper to me. Cue stupid claims of being censored, and my struggle to den-politely explain that he was being an idiot, what censorship is, etc.

Today I was listening to NPR, an interviewee said something I found dubious*, and, in my usual "someone is wrong on the internetradio" fashion, called bullshit on my facebook page, citing wikipedia for something that wasn't even my main point. Stupid, meaningless, but "I have to set things straight about this meaningless thing!" idiocy. Like you do.

He comments to set me straight about a minor historical point**, a semantic point**, and then insult the paper again with bullshit about "oh, so reporters for this paper I hate for no reason use wikipedia! Well, that explains things because I hate and fear new democratic internet things!" So I deleted the comment and, again, because of my "Someone is wrong on the internet!" stupidity, addressed his other points, even admitting "ok, I was wrong about this historical thing. My point still stands, and here's why, and if you want to argue semantics, I guess you can, but even so..."

He then proceeds to post a status on his page along the lines of "yay censorship! Welcome to the Fox News Family [Prak, tagged]!"

I proceeded to type and delete two or three very pissed off responses, and finally settled for an approximation of calmness while explaining that deleting an insulting comment from my page is not censorship. Which he childishly deleted, and responded to with likening me to O'Reilly, etc. As I was trying to calmly respond to this, I was saved a bit by another friend, an actual friend, calling him out on his insulting poor argumentation crap, and was able to keep enough composure to explain again and finally close with "don't ever bother me again, I don't have to put up with toxic assholes" and block him.

So incredibly stupid, and even more so to have adrenaline over this bullshit, but... here we are.

...I'm thinking I'm going to go kill some dragons and bandits for a bit. Once this stupid feeling wears off.

*"The cocktail was invented in New Orleans"
**"New Orleans as a port predates America, being established [date]" and "Grog isn't a cocktail" (yes it is)

Ancient History · Post by **Ancient History** » Tue Feb 10, 2015 10:25 am

Grog is so a cocktail. And cocktails were not invented in New Orleans. Not all of them, at any rate.

Orca · Post by **Orca** » Tue Feb 10, 2015 1:35 pm

People were mixing different types of booze in classical times. Probably earlier too, but that's the one we have archaeological evidence from (that I know of). New Orleans certainly wasn't founded then.

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Feb 10, 2015 6:53 pm

Your friend sounds like a real ass, Prak. I have been in similar stupid arguments with people on my friends list. I usually just post image macros at them until they figure out that I don't take their opinions into any sort of consideration. Sometimes it takes a while.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Thu Feb 12, 2015 11:54 am

Another resume thing-

I did up a character sheet looking resume to send to Roll20. Thoughts before I email it out after some sleep? Should I include a traditional resume in the email as well, just to be safe?