The Gaming Den

What the hell happened to the latest pokemon?

The first evolutions of the new starters have been shown, and two of them are utterly retarded.

Link

So, you have a Grass Snake pokemon, which could be awesome for a starter. Except they give it legs and arms. SNAKES DO NOT HAVE ARMS!

And then you have the Sea Otter pokemon. Which looks really sad. Like its just about to slit it's wrists. Why does it look so stupid? I almost prefer bidoof for fucks sake. Hell, I can forgive a lot for being able to make a dam visible from space.

The fire pig looks insanely cute and probably looks like the most reasonable. Once again the fire pokemon looks the "coolest".

I don't want to be one of those guys who keeps saying that the only real pokemon were the 1st generation, but you have a snake with limbs and an emo otter. Oh, and another humanoid furry bait fox.

---

Hmmm... I'm trying to think of alternatives, but coming up with a possible water pokemon is incredibly difficult. I mean, you can set just about anything on fire and it will be fine for the fire pokemon. Just have a lion with a flaming mane or something.

The grass is also pretty easy- the grass snake could work, or you could have an elk/caribou with branches for the antlers, or even a moving mound of grass.

But coming up with a water pokemon is tricky. Frog? Polar bear? Wait, thats bad because it almost needs to be Water/Ice and so end up weak to fire and resisting grass. Hmmm... the otter doesn't seem that bad. If only it didn't look so retarded.

Have you seen the Hairy Nosed Otter?



Their sea otter is both very ottery and actually cuter than actual otters.

-Crissa

Parthenon wrote:two of them are utterly retarded

Man I don't know what you're talking about, that smug lizard with the popped collar is pretty much the best thing ever.

A Hammer wrote:

Parthenon wrote:two of them are utterly retarded

Man I don't know what you're talking about, that smug lizard with the popped collar is pretty much the best thing ever.

I've been playing Final Fantasy 4: The After Years. (Been on an FF4 kick lately, I contend that it was the best of the series as far as story goes.)

I just want to say one thing: Ceodor SUCKS.

The idea is that his daddy was a paladin and his mommy was a white mage, so they made him halfway between the two. I get that, but the implementation is terrible. He's basically a heavy armor and sword using character with mediocre white magic with low stats all around. His healing is shitty, his attack is shitty, despite having heavy armor his HP is shitty and he dies in two or three hits. Shitty shitty shitty.

Avoraciopoctules wrote:I just learned about a 6-for-1 pay-what-you want sale on some indie games I have been very interested in for a few years now. Mac, Windows, and Linux versions are available. It's one of those times I really regret deciding to stay away from e-commerce. I am going to talk to my sister and see if she would be willing to serve as a middleman.

http://www.wolfire.com/humble

Avoraciopoctules: thanks for this. I just bought the bundle.

Parthenon wrote:What the hell happened to the latest pokemon?

The first evolutions of the new starters have been shown, and two of them are utterly retarded.

Link

So, you have a Grass Snake pokemon, which could be awesome for a starter. Except they give it legs and arms. SNAKES DO NOT HAVE ARMS!

And then you have the Sea Otter pokemon. Which looks really sad. Like its just about to slit it's wrists. Why does it look so stupid? I almost prefer bidoof for fucks sake. Hell, I can forgive a lot for being able to make a dam visible from space.

The fire pig looks insanely cute and probably looks like the most reasonable. Once again the fire pokemon looks the "coolest".

I don't want to be one of those guys who keeps saying that the only real pokemon were the 1st generation, but you have a snake with limbs and an emo otter. Oh, and another humanoid furry bait fox.

I don't usually say this but...go suck a barrel of cocks.

The Sea Otter is an adorable Mameshiba thing and the Grass starter is a non-retarded version of Treeko from Gen III. The fire-pig is my personal unfavorite because he seems like a lamer version of Spoink.

It's different strokes for different folks. Still want you to get to sucking though.

Count Arioch the 28th wrote:I've been playing Final Fantasy 4: The After Years. (Been on an FF4 kick lately, I contend that it was the best of the series as far as story goes.)

I think Final Fantasy 6 has better characterization and that Final Fantasy 7 is a fuckton funnier (it's the funniest of the entire series, I don't know why they decided to do an angst reboot), but yeah this is a fair assessment.

Just because something is cliche doesn't mean that it's bad.

I just want to say one thing: Ceodor SUCKS.

He's apparently supposed to take a huge leap in badassery in later episodes, like Edward thar.

Lago PARANOIA wrote:

Count Arioch the 28th wrote:I've been playing Final Fantasy 4: The After Years. (Been on an FF4 kick lately, I contend that it was the best of the series as far as story goes.)

I think Final Fantasy 6 has better characterization and that Final Fantasy 7 is a fuckton funnier (it's the funniest of the entire series, I don't know why they decided to do an angst reboot), but yeah this is a fair assessment.

Just because something is cliche doesn't mean that it's bad.

I just want to say one thing: Ceodor SUCKS.

He's apparently supposed to take a huge leap in badassery in later episodes, like Edward thar.

Yeah, well right now I'm considering not playing anymore because of his suckitude. Granted, I like the character. He does try REAL hard and he is supposed to be in over his head. However, after getting Game Over after Game Over, I'm starting to get irritated. Last time was real cheap, that stupid Frog formation in the cave to Damcyan. I got surprised, then the monsters hit both characters with Frog, then beat me to death before my meter was even full. Fucking bitches.

You know, I might pick up Paper Mario 64 again.

While TTYD is technically a better game in plot, characterization, the battle system, humor, minigames, and sidequests Paper Mario 64 isn't as complicated to pick up and play.

But then again, I would really love to play that train section again... fuck! Why did I save over that! Ridiculous murder mystery parodies on a train rule.

I love frogs ^-^

At least, in Final Fantasy.

-Crissa

Lago PARANOIA wrote:You know, I might pick up Paper Mario 64 again.

While TTYD is technically a better game in plot, characterization, the battle system, humor, minigames, and sidequests Paper Mario 64 isn't as complicated to pick up and play.

But then again, I would really love to play that train section again... fuck! Why did I save over that! Ridiculous murder mystery parodies on a train rule.

I took a cue from my sister's file on Twilight Princess.

Before she got to that section with the western-shootout, she saved another file so she could go back and play it when she wanted.

So I've got a spare save file for the train chapter...

You know, Super Contra just isn't as fun to beat as Contra I and II for the NES.

Super Contra's difficulty is really grindy. Pound for pound the difficulty is easier than on the NES, but the game is a fuckton longer. Some people might prefer that, since it means more gameplay, but I really don't.

Graphics are real pretty, though.

Mask_De_H wrote:The Sea Otter is an adorable Mameshiba thing and the Grass starter is a non-retarded version of Treeko from Gen III. The fire-pig is my personal unfavorite because he seems like a lamer version of Spoink.

After letting it sink in for a while I'm now fine with the otter. I hate the fact that theres a shellder attached to his chest but thats the normal image of a sea otter- floating on it's back with a shell on the chest.

But how is it not retarded to have a grass snake with arms and legs? Make the body slightly longer and get rid of the arms and legs and it would be great. I admit I'm mostly just getting stupid about the limbs now though.

And I don't understand the hate for the fire starter because of a previous pokemon. You don't complain about Piplup because Delibird exists do you? Well, you might, but you'd be an idiot to do so. Delibird can go suck a dogs asshole. Just get in there and seriously suck it.

Non-retarded version of Treeko? Sceptile is one of the most awesome grass pokemon ever.

Surgo wrote:Non-retarded version of Treeko? Sceptile is one of the most awesome grass pokemon ever.

I have to disagree. Treecko and its evolution has nothing to offer me. Its most interesting move is...Leaf Blade.

Within its own generation, both the Torchic evolution and the Mudkip evolution are much more interesting, and I got a deep satisfaction from using the Water-type to solo an electric-type gym leader. Both of those learned more interesting and useful moves.

Compared to the other grass-type starters, I'd still take them over Treecko. Both Venusaur and Meganium had some better stuff than Sceptile, and I'm pretty sure the D/P grass-type is more fun to use, too. All Sceptile had was a cool animation for Leaf Blade.

I was talking about as a general pokemon, it was fucking awesome in concept and execution. If you want to get onto moves and movesets...

...Sceptile is still awesome. It was one of the fastest pokemon of that generation. It could sub-seed with that awesome seed. It was a credible swords dance threat, could thunderpunch, could endeavor...and god damn, it had a base 120 speed.

Honestly though, all of the Hoenn starters were awesome pokemon. Probably the best starter set overall, of any generation.

Surgo wrote:I was talking about as a general pokemon, it was fucking awesome in concept and execution. If you want to get onto moves and movesets...

...Sceptile is still awesome. It was one of the fastest pokemon of that generation. It could sub-seed with that awesome seed. It was a credible swords dance threat, could thunderpunch, could endeavor...and god damn, it had a base 120 speed.

Honestly though, all of the Hoenn starters were awesome pokemon. Probably the best starter set overall, of any generation.

Still have to disagree with you about Sceptile. That head and tail...well, don't look cool to me. Or, rather, it could have been a lot cooler--both Blaziken and Swampert look pretty nifty.

But the Hoenn starters *are* insane. Blaziken has the highest attack of all the Starter pokemon evolutions. It's special attack is up there, too.

But Sceptile has a high speed...which, sure, is nice. But if I have to ditch any stat, it's speed, because it functions on a binary. Either you're faster than them, or you're not. And even if you do have a bazillion speed, it'll still get to use a move every turn.

So, yeah. Sceptile just doesn't do much for me. The playthrough where I chose Treecko was irritating because with the other two, I was getting fun things like Double Kick and Slash and Muddy Water and this time I was getting...Quick Attack. And Pursuit.

sceptile looked like ass. Grovyle, though it had a stupid name, looked fucking awesome, I remember my first playthrough I was reluctant to let it evolve to sceptile for that exact reason.

Of the new ones.... ugh. they're doing another cutesy era. I fucking hate most of a couple gens just because they decided to make *everything* fucking cutesy.

On the other hand, though, D/P/Pt had super cutesy starters, that actually had ok-decent looking final forms, so we'll see, I guess.

I don't want to be one of those guys who keeps saying that the only real pokemon were the 1st generation

The only real Pokemon were the first generation. Everything else is shit tier. It's the reason that I have no interest in the later generations of game.

Psychic Robot wrote:

I don't want to be one of those guys who keeps saying that the only real pokemon were the 1st generation

The only real Pokemon were the first generation. Everything else is shit tier. It's the reason that I have no interest in the later generations of game.

I concur with this sentiment wholeheartedly. They've had a few decent Pokemon designs since the original games were released, but it doesn't seem like they're even trying any more. *shrug*

I'm with PR on the Pokemon front. I may get the remakes, but that's it. I played Silver, but that was it for the later gens. I just can't seem to like most of the designs.

Count Arioch the 28th wrote: Yeah, well right now I'm considering not playing anymore because of his suckitude. Granted, I like the character. He does try REAL hard and he is supposed to be in over his head. However, after getting Game Over after Game Over, I'm starting to get irritated. Last time was real cheap, that stupid Frog formation in the cave to Damcyan. I got surprised, then the monsters hit both characters with Frog, then beat me to death before my meter was even full. Fucking bitches.

It took me awhile to figure out why it was that bothered me about this post, but I finally did.

There's a Final Fantasy game where having one crappy guy on your roster will screw you over? In FF1, I can't think of a step up where someone won't suck at some point. FF2 and FF3, I don't really remember, except in one of them, everyone sucked. In FF4, you routinely have crappy people forced on you. In FF5, getting the best skill requires playing pretty shitty classes for a long while.. Sadly, I never played 6. In FF7, you have to play Cloud for almost the entire game, so that sucks. Though numerically, Aeris is total crap most of the time she's around. In FF8, everyone but Squall will fall far behind in levels if you played the game like it seemed like you should. FF9 routinely had crappy people around all the time. FF10 was hard to quantify. FF12 depended on what skills you gave everyone, more than anything.'

I don't really have a point, beyond the idea that one guy in an FF game dragging you down is a very new thing that is barely believable without seeing it for myself.

Jilocasin wrote:

This.

Also: In Genesis 3, "The Serpent" is a snake with arms and legs. There's definitely precedent for a snake that lives in a tree of some kind and has arms and legs.

-Username17