Let's Play Fighting Fantasy #1: Warlock of Firetop Mountain

[Darth Rabbitt]

You grope around the length of the wall and find a door. Quickly you fumble with the handle. It opens!

You enter another small room, bare except for a fountain in the middle. Not a particularly grand affair, the fountain is a small carved fish, and a short jet of water comes from its mouth. A wooden sign hangs from the fish and this bears a message. It is written in Goblin tongue, at which you are not very proficient. The first word you cannot understand, but the others read ". . . NOT DRINK". But you are extremely thirsty. Will you drink from the fountain? Otherwise you can pass it by and leave through a door in the north wall.

[MisterDee]

Take a swig.

[MisterDee]

Take a swig.

[Darth Rabbitt]

The water is refreshing. As you drink more you feel a glow spreading through your body as if you were drinking at the fountain of life. Add 4 STAMINA points, and restore your SKILL and LUCK scores to their Initial levels. The fountain of life for you must be the fountain of death for the evil Goblins. You may eat Provisions here. When you have rested leave through the north door.

(No reason for Henderson to eat since he's back at full everything.)

The door opens into a passage which you follow northwards. Shortly you reach a bend and follow it round to the east. Several meters on, you reach a junction at which you may either go north or continue eastwards.

Old Man Henderson Jr.
SKILL 11/11
STAMINA 16/16
LUCK 10/10
Equipment: Sword, Leather Armor, Crescent Shield (when hit, roll a d6; on a 6 reduce damage by 1)
Provisions: 9 (+4 STAMINA each)
Potions: Potion of Skill (restores SKILL to Initial value, 2/2 uses left), Potion of Invisibility (1 use)
Gold Pieces: 6
Keys: Bronze Key #99
Items: Silky Black Glove, Bow and Silver Arrow, Cheese, Burnt-Out Blue Candle

[Chamomile]

I'm pretty sure we determined that west was always wrong when navigating a Livingstone dungeon, and we went west once, so I say we go east to course correct. I have completely forgotten this section of the book, so I haven't the slightest idea if the game is even winnable anymore, but I have a hunch that if west is bad, east is probably good.

[Omegonthesane]

East I guess.

[Darth Rabbitt]

The passage twists and turns and eventually ends in a solid iron door. You listen but hear nothing. You can try to open the door or you can go back to the junction.

[Omegonthesane]

Open: the Dooring.

[Darth Rabbitt]

The room is unoccupied and there seems to be no other means of exit. In the center of the floor stands a table, and on this table there are two helmets; one of bronze and one of iron. Both are about your size. Will you try one on, or is this worth the risk?

Try on the bronze helmet
Try on the iron helmet
Return to the junction

[Omegonthesane]

Bronze, because it's clearly worse so the iron is likely a trap.

[MisterDee]

Yeah, try the bronze one. That said, it's likely both are traps, but that should be entertaining anyway.

[Darth Rabbitt]

You place the helmet on your head. It fits well. Suddenly a searing pain flashes across your forehead. You cannot think straight. This helmet is cursed and, try as you might, you cannot remove it! Reduce your SKILL score by 1. The pain soon subsides, but you still cannot shift the helmet. You stagger back to the junction, trying desperately to compose yourself.

(Do we want to take some of our SKILL potion now? This is the first time we've lost a point.)

You arrive back at the junction and this time turn northwards.

Some way up the passage, you reach another junction where you may either go eastwards or turn westwards.

Old Man Henderson Jr.
SKILL 10/11
STAMINA 16/16
LUCK 10/10
Equipment: Sword, Leather Armor, Crescent Shield (when hit, roll a d6; on a 6 reduce damage by 1), Cursed Bronze Helmet
Provisions: 9 (+4 STAMINA each)
Potions: Potion of Skill (restores SKILL to Initial value, 2/2 uses left), Potion of Invisibility (1 use)
Gold Pieces: 6
Keys: Bronze Key #99
Items: Silky Black Glove, Bow and Silver Arrow, Cheese, Burnt-Out Blue Candle

[MisterDee]

Take a shot of potion. It's really unlikely that we'll hit two more Skill reductions in the rest of the book.

Then go east.

Out of curiosity, what would have happened if we'd taken the other helmet?

[Omegonthesane]

Save the potion until we drop to 8 I say.

Seconding "east" and "what does the other helmet do".

[Darth Rabbitt]

(I'll tell you that the iron helmet adds 1 to your Attack Strength in combat. It's actually pretty damn nice.)

The passageway ahead of you widens and you can see ahead a large cavern. As you shine your lantern ahead you can see crude stone weapons on the floor and a smoldering fire in the center of the cave. But you see no way through. As you turn to make your way back you stop in your tracks to see two Neanderthal CAVEMEN barring your exit. They grunt aggressively at you. You draw your sword and must prepare to fight.

First CAVEMAN SKILL 7 STAMINA 6
Second CAVEMAN SKILL 6 STAMINA 4

Fight them one at a time.

(Before we fight, do we want to SKILL up? There's a 1-1 tie on it so far, and we're about to enter combat, so we can't do it mid-fight but can do it right now.)

[Chamomile]

Don't skill up. Save it until our Skill drops to 8 or below. Anything of a 9 or higher has been more than enough so far.

[Darth Rabbitt]

(OK, tie is broken)

First CAVEMAN SKILL 7 STAMINA 6
Second CAVEMAN SKILL 6 STAMINA 4

Fight them one at a time.

Combat Log:

Caveman A 14, Henderson 15. Caveman A is at 4.
Caveman A 14, Henderson 19. Caveman A is at 2.
Caveman A 19, Henderson 21. Caveman A is dead.
Caveman B 11, Henderson 18. Caveman B is at 2.
Caveman B 17, Henderson 21. Caveman B is dead.

You leave the cavern and return to the junction.

You arrive back at the junction and progress westwards.

The passageway twists sharply northwards and ahead you can hear water flowing. You eventually reach the south bank of an underground river. As you stand on the pebbled bank you hear a fluttering of wings and look up to see three GIANT BATS swooping down on you to attack. Fight these three as a single creature.

GIANT BATS SKILL 6 STAMINA 6

(There's the option to Escape by jumping into the river, but I know we won't take it.)

Combat Log:

Bats 11, Henderson 18. Bats are at 4.
Bats 13, Henderson 18. Bats are at 2.
Bats 11, Henderson 15. Bats are dead.

(Join the Tharn Doppelganger from Space Assassin in FF Bat Hell, foul creatures! Flawless Victories on three Giant Bats and two Cavemen for Henderson, even with a SKILL penalty!)

You sheathe your sword and walk up to the water. Is it safe to swim? Although you cannot see any immediate signs of danger either in the water or around its banks, there is no way through on the north side of the river. You suddenly notice a gleaming sword lying on the river bed several steps in. You wade in to retrieve it. It is light in your hand, far less cumbersome than your own weapon, and it has a keen edge. This marvelous weapon will add 1 point to your SKILL whilst you use it. Note this on your Equipment List. A mysterious voice speaking directly to your mind seems to be telling you to throw your own sword into the river. Will you? Or do you want to keep both swords?

Old Man Henderson Jr.
SKILL 11/11
STAMINA 16/16
LUCK 10/10
Equipment: Gleaming Sword, Sword, Leather Armor, Crescent Shield (when hit, roll a d6; on a 6 reduce damage by 1), Cursed Bronze Helmet
Provisions: 9 (+4 STAMINA each)
Potions: Potion of Skill (restores SKILL to Initial value, 2/2 uses left), Potion of Invisibility (1 use)
Gold Pieces: 6
Keys: Bronze Key #99
Items: Silky Black Glove, Bow and Silver Arrow, Cheese, Burnt-Out Blue Candle

[Chamomile]

I smell a trap. Toss the sword, as our skill is plentiful already. Also, dammit, I'm almost positive we were supposed to have two keys before reaching the river. Obviously we'd want to double back and investigate some of the junctions we skipped, but this is a Fighting Fantasy book so instead we'll just chuck the sword and then be compelled by authorial fiat to follow it into the water.

[Darth Rabbitt]

As your sword splashes into the water, a bubbly voice says, "Thank you!" It now seems that the only way onwards is to swim downstream to the east. You plunge into the water.

The current is strong and takes you swiftly downstream. You are washed along through a narrow opening and out into a large cavern with banks on both sides. The current washes you on to the south bank

You are on the south bank of an underground river facing across its black depths. There appear to be four ways of crossing. To your left, a rusted bell bears the sign "Ferry Service 2 Gold Pieces - Please Ring." There is a small raft in front of you on the bank with a long stick resting beside it: you could punt across the river. A rickety old bridge crosses on the right. If you don't trust any of these, you may swim. Which will you choose?

Ring the bell
Punt the raft across
Risk the bridge
Swim

Old Man Henderson Jr.
SKILL 11/11
STAMINA 16/16
LUCK 10/10
Equipment: Gleaming Sword, Leather Armor, Crescent Shield (when hit, roll a d6; on a 6 reduce damage by 1), Cursed Bronze Helmet
Provisions: 9 (+4 STAMINA each)
Potions: Potion of Skill (restores SKILL to Initial value, 2/2 uses left), Potion of Invisibility (1 use)
Gold Pieces: 6
Keys: Bronze Key #99
Items: Silky Black Glove, Bow and Silver Arrow, Cheese, Burnt-Out Blue Candle

[Chamomile]

It now seems that the only way onwards is to swim downstream to the east.

Yes. That is definitely the only way onwards. There's definitely no way we could double back and look for a bridge or anything. Nope. The river is the only possible option.

We have enough gold pieces to pay the boatman, so let's take that.

[Omegonthesane]

(8) Get on a boat! Get on a boat! (8)

[Shrapnel]

Let's ring the hell out of that bell.

[Darth Rabbitt]

(OK, looks like we ring.)

The bell gives a dull clang and after a few moments you see a withered old man climb into a small rowing boat moored on the north bank. He rows slowly across to you, moors the boat and limps towards you. He asks you for 3 Gold Pieces. When you protest at the price he mumbles some flimsy excuse about "inflation." He begins to get angry at your protestations. Do you pay him the 3 Gold Pieces or threaten him?

(Not sure why we'd be so upset about a 1.5x price increase when the guy who sold us a candle admitted to a 4x price increase.)

[Omegonthesane]

*mumbles some flimsy excuse about "editing"*

Threaten him - we're a murdering hobo.

[Darth Rabbitt]

He doesn't take at all kindly to your threats. As you argue and his anger builds, you notice a transformation taking place. He begins to straighten up and grows physically stronger in front of your very eyes. His face and arms grow hairy. His teeth become sharp and pointed. You must make a quick decision. Will you offer him 5 Gold Pieces to calm him down or prepare to attack him?

(Shit, he's turning into Robin Williams!)