[Non-US] News That Makes You laugh/cry/neither...

[Maj]

How can people not tell the difference in what they're eating?!

[Kaelik]

How can people not tell the difference in what they're eating?!

Uh..... that might be the dumbest thing you have ever said.

Why do we even have an FDA? People should just take the tasteless but lethal poisons in their food!

[Maj]

Oh. Since the last dumbest thing I've ever said?

We're not talking adulterated food here. I can understand that people not know the difference between milk with melamine in it or milk without.

We're talking fake food. Whole cloth. Doesn't contain any part of the original at all. It's like American processed cheese food product. Or krab. Or Cool Whip. Or wooden nutmegs. Or... The BBC article even describes how you can tell the two apart.

This dude got away with this for a year. It's not like a few people tried the stuff and then called him out. It's like 20,000 pounds was sold to people and no one did anything about it.

[Count Arioch the 28th]

Krab is delicious. That is all.

[Prak]

Processed cheese product actually generally starts as cheese, specifically cheddar. They just then add a ton of oil to make it melt in a more aesthetically pleasing manner. Also, imitation crab is still fish, it's just an entirely different animal that's chopped up and painted. Cool whip actually contains skim milk and light cream. So... like, none of those things you mentioned, except wooden nutmeg, are whole-cloth fabrications of not-food. Even cool whip has a relation to the thing it's mimicking. And wooden nutmeg is an anecdote I'd never even heard of until I read your post just now.

[Maj]

Processed cheese product actually generally starts as cheese, specifically cheddar. They just then add a ton of oil to make it melt in a more aesthetically pleasing manner. Also, imitation crab is still fish, it's just an entirely different animal that's chopped up and painted. Cool whip actually contains skim milk and light cream. So... like, none of those things you mentioned, except wooden nutmeg, are whole-cloth fabrications of not-food. Even cool whip has a relation to the thing it's mimicking. And wooden nutmeg is an anecdote I'd never even heard of until I read your post just now.

Seriously? I used the wrong term for the cheese shit... Which is mostly hydrogenated oil. I think it's processed slices now.

But you're actually making my point for me. If those fake foods do include small amounts of the thing they're supposed to be imitating (skim milk is cream? WTF?) and you can clearly tell that they're not what they say they are, why can't people tell the difference between something that doesn't contain any part of what it claims to be, and what it's supposed to be? Or do they just not care? Because yes... Krab is tasty. But it's certainly not crab.

[Kaelik]

Oh. Since the last dumbest thing I've ever said?

We're not talking adulterated food here. I can understand that people not know the difference between milk with melamine in it or milk without.

We're talking fake food. Whole cloth. Doesn't contain any part of the original at all. It's like American processed cheese food product. Or krab. Or Cool Whip. Or wooden nutmegs. Or... The BBC article even describes how you can tell the two apart.

This dude got away with this for a year. It's not like a few people tried the stuff and then called him out. It's like 20,000 pounds was sold to people and no one did anything about it.

Oh you mean people didn't notice that one element of their salad that might be spiced and sauced tasted slightly different from the last time they ate jellyfish a year ago? If they ever ate jellyfish?

So just to be clear, if I start replacing random ass parts of your food with synthetics, it's totally your fault if you don't notice, because everyone can always tell the difference between deliberate forgeries of rare foods as one component of a dish.

[Prak]

Maj, there's a huge difference between "melt real cheese, add a ton of oil" or even "combine skim milk, light cream, sugar and oil and tell people to keep it in the freezer so it doesn't separate" and "mix three non-organic chemicals into strands of translucent jelly"

Also, there's a reason that the terms "american singles" and "imitation crab" and "non-dairy dessert topping" exist. It's because the average consumer doesn't know the difference.

[Maj]

Maj, there's a huge difference between "melt real cheese, add a ton of oil" or even "combine skim milk, light cream, sugar and oil and tell people to keep it in the freezer so it doesn't separate" and "mix three non-organic chemicals into strands of translucent jelly"

Also, there's a reason that the terms "american singles" and "imitation crab" and "non-dairy dessert topping" exist. It's because the average consumer doesn't know the difference.

It's not real cheese. American cheese starts off as cheese. But this stuff doesn't. Also, when I was growing up, Cool Whip didn't have dairy in it. They changed the formula sometime in 2010ish? But that's not the fucking point. Seriously. Not the point. The point is... Oh, fuck it. It's not worth my time.

[Kaelik]

Maj, there's a huge difference between "melt real cheese, add a ton of oil" or even "combine skim milk, light cream, sugar and oil and tell people to keep it in the freezer so it doesn't separate" and "mix three non-organic chemicals into strands of translucent jelly"

Also, there's a reason that the terms "american singles" and "imitation crab" and "non-dairy dessert topping" exist. It's because the average consumer doesn't know the difference.

It's not real cheese. American cheese starts off as cheese. But this stuff doesn't. Also, when I was growing up, Cool Whip didn't have dairy in it. They changed the formula sometime in 2010ish? But that's not the fucking point. Seriously. Not the point. The point is... Oh, fuck it. It's not worth my time.

The point is that people should use their magic fucking powers to taste forgeries that are specifically designed to fool them, especially when the forgeries are of extremely rare foods they don't eat often, and eaten as part of a dish with sauces and spices and other foods.

Because it is always and forever the fault of the swindled that they were swindled, and that is why government is bad.

[erik]

I confess that if I eat something that tastes off, I just write it off as a bad specimen or poorly prepared. Or just as likely, my uncultured palate might even prefer something fake.

[Prak]

Maj, there's a huge difference between "melt real cheese, add a ton of oil" or even "combine skim milk, light cream, sugar and oil and tell people to keep it in the freezer so it doesn't separate" and "mix three non-organic chemicals into strands of translucent jelly"

Also, there's a reason that the terms "american singles" and "imitation crab" and "non-dairy dessert topping" exist. It's because the average consumer doesn't know the difference.

It's not real cheese. American cheese starts off as cheese. But this stuff doesn't. Also, when I was growing up, Cool Whip didn't have dairy in it. They changed the formula sometime in 2010ish? But that's not the fucking point. Seriously. Not the point. The point is... Oh, fuck it. It's not worth my time.

The stuff you're thinking of is mechanically and chemically altered cheese, that's just what it is. Some regions will not allow some varieties of the stuff to be labeled cheese, even if that's what they start as. I will point out that white chocolate isn't chocolate, either, and if you're in Europe, you'll know that, because the packaging doesn't call it chocolate, but in America, we don't care as much about food, and so you can totally call a bunch of sugar and cocoa fat "chocolate," even though all the actual chocolate was removed.

[Leress]

Hey, Maj, how much jellyfish have you eaten? Could you tell the difference between the real and the fake?

[virgil]

I would infer that jellyfish is probably not worth it if the flavour can be switched out with a concoction of chemicals.

[Prak]

That's actually kind of BS, virgil. Artificial flavoring is totally a thing these days, and often the only difference between natural and artificial flavor, literally, is whether the makers pulled the flavor from the real thing, or mixed up the individual chemicals that make up the flavor themselves.

Seriously, we've gotten flavors and fragrances figured out at a molecular level, and we can 100% replicate them with chemicals, not just aesthetically, but the actual chemical structure.

So if you think it's not worth eating something if you can replicate the flavor with some chemicals, then you just declared a lot of things not worth eating.

[maglag]

I will point out that white chocolate isn't chocolate, either, and if you're in Europe, you'll know that, because the packaging doesn't call it chocolate, but in America, we don't care as much about food, and so you can totally call a bunch of sugar and cocoa fat "chocolate," even though all the actual chocolate was removed.

I can't speak for all of Europe, but back in my home country, we call it "Chocolate Branco". Where "Branco" means indeed white.

Spanish call it Chocolate Blanco.

French call it Chocolat Blanc.

Maybe somewhere in middle-eastern Europe they call it something else, but a sizeable portion of Europe does call white chocolate just that.

[Maj]

Hey, Maj, how much jellyfish have you eaten? Could you tell the difference between the real and the fake?

No. But then, it's not popular sliced and served as a salad where I live, and it's not sold at the farmer's market, either.

Because it is always and forever the fault of the swindled that they were swindled, and that is why government is bad.

Fuck off with that shit. I'm pro-FDA. I think small government shitheads are exactly that. And I'm not blaming the victims for being swindled. I just don't understand how that kind of thing thrives. But then... Americans eat cheap foods made in China, too. I'm just picky as hell.

[virgil]

That's actually kind of BS, virgil. Artificial flavoring is totally a thing these days, and often the only difference between natural and artificial flavor, literally, is whether the makers pulled the flavor from the real thing, or mixed up the individual chemicals that make up the flavor themselves.

Learn context. The fake jellyfish isn't a case of artificial flavoring, and the syndicate wasn't trying to replicate the flavour; they were trying to get the shape of jellyfish tentacles, and health was certainly a pretty low priority.

[Prak]

I will point out that white chocolate isn't chocolate, either, and if you're in Europe, you'll know that, because the packaging doesn't call it chocolate, but in America, we don't care as much about food, and so you can totally call a bunch of sugar and cocoa fat "chocolate," even though all the actual chocolate was removed.

I can't speak for all of Europe, but back in my home country, we call it "Chocolate Branco". Where "Branco" means indeed white.

Spanish call it Chocolate Blanco.

French call it Chocolat Blanc.

Maybe somewhere in middle-eastern Europe they call it something else, but a sizeable portion of Europe does call white chocolate just that.

Huh, I was told otherwise in my culinary classes.

That's actually kind of BS, virgil. Artificial flavoring is totally a thing these days, and often the only difference between natural and artificial flavor, literally, is whether the makers pulled the flavor from the real thing, or mixed up the individual chemicals that make up the flavor themselves.

Learn context. The fake jellyfish isn't a case of artificial flavoring, and the syndicate wasn't trying to replicate the flavour; they were trying to get the shape of jellyfish tentacles, and health was certainly a pretty low priority.

And yet your words were

I would infer that jellyfish is probably not worth it if the flavour can be switched out with a concoction of chemicals.

And my entire point was "we can switch out a lot of flavors with concoctions of chemicals, because we know what chemicals compose the real thing, and we can totally put those chemicals in a beaker instead of an apple."

[virgil]

Yes, my words, with the context of forgeries made with the goal of being roughly the same shape and no regard for flavor or health (8 times China's legal limit of aluminum).

[phlapjackage]

And I'm not blaming the victims for being swindled. I just don't understand how that kind of thing thrives. But then... Americans eat cheap foods made in China, too. I'm just picky as hell.

People in China are on average much poorer than in the US, so it's not as easy to be picky about food. Plus in this case, yeah, there's a good chance noone knew what "real" (or "good") jellyfish was supposed to taste like, plus all the spices and whatnot...and if the price is right...

Food safety is a big topic* here in China. There's been a few stories that've caused hysteria that I doubt are true (pure 100% fake eggs for less than 1RMB, fake rice that's made of paper). And there's been some true stories too...I'm not saying this jellyfish story isn't true at all, just that I would suggest taking any "food safety" story to come out of China with a grain of salt (real salt, ha!) and don't immediately get outraged at the first read.

*big topic as in, it's talked about a lot and affects people's buying decisions a lot

[Koumei]

Wait, you're saying I can't just take sankakucomplex 'X in China" stories at face value? My entire worldview has been turned upside down.

[erik]

My entire worldview has been turned upside down.

I thought that came with being Australian.

[RobbyPants]

Hey, Maj, how much jellyfish have you eaten? Could you tell the difference between the real and the fake?

No. But then, it's not popular sliced and served as a salad where I live, and it's not sold at the farmer's market, either.

My guess is, a lot of people over there didn't catch on, either. I mean I understand your surprise that a combination of three chemicals could pass as an organic delicacy; I thought the same thing. Still, the fact that this is even an issue probably means that it's harder to tell than we might initially think.

[Bigode]

O nockermensch, where art thou?

Since he didn't say: president Rousseff was suspended for investigation. The vice-president, leader of PMDB (biggest cancer on Brazilian politics, remember), is now president.