Shit You Wish Was Better

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Sun Nov 24, 2013 3:48 am

A buddy told me about Project M. Which is a serious hardcore effort to rebalance Brawl. And bring in some other characters and stages.

Works by plugging an SD card into the wii, apparently. A link, just to be helpful.

rampaging-poet · Post by **rampaging-poet** » Sun Nov 24, 2013 4:43 am

Yeah, buggy custom stages can crash the Wii and make it run arbitrary code from an SD card. It's something I've been considering trying for some time now, but I never had anything worth the (minute, these hacks are well-tested) risk of breaking the Wii or losing access to the games I'd bought on the Virtual Console.

Speaking of Brawl, I wish The Subspace Emissary had been more coherent. Sticking with the same characters for more than one stage at a time would have been nice.

OgreBattle · Post by **OgreBattle** » Sun Nov 24, 2013 6:47 am

Goddamn Nintendo region locking. If I want to play Pokemon X/Y in English I need the American 3DS, but if I want to play Monster Hunter 4 with my co-workers I need a Japanese 3DS.

Why they insist on region locking in this day and age, I do not know.

JonSetanta · Post by **JonSetanta** » Sun Nov 24, 2013 6:53 am

I'll just stick with vanilla Brawl kthx

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Nov 24, 2013 6:56 am

OgreBattle wrote:Goddamn Nintendo region locking. If I want to play Pokemon X/Y in English I need the American 3DS, but if I want to play Monster Hunter 4 with my co-workers I need a Japanese 3DS.

Why they insist on region locking in this day and age, I do not know.

I would be willing to bet you could find an sd card thing or something that would simulate the appropriate region.

OgreBattle · Post by **OgreBattle** » Tue Nov 26, 2013 9:20 am

Prak_Anima wrote:
OgreBattle wrote:Goddamn Nintendo region locking. If I want to play Pokemon X/Y in English I need the American 3DS, but if I want to play Monster Hunter 4 with my co-workers I need a Japanese 3DS.

Why they insist on region locking in this day and age, I do not know.
I would be willing to bet you could find an sd card thing or something that would simulate the appropriate region.

The problem with that is unlocking it will disable online play 'cause Nintendo detacts that sorta thing.

...

Dark Souls

It's a fun game, but it bugs me that rolling around is the primary means of defense. It's a proven mechanic, but when I stop and think, it feels pretty weird that these knights always roll around to avoid each other's blows.

Also little things like how there's no good reason to wield a katana in two hands, because it's mostly dex based so that's going to be a dual wielding build anyways. And then the falchion, they classify it as a slashing dex based weapon when it should be a chopping weapon that uses strength, like an axe dangit!

Surgo · Post by **Surgo** » Tue Nov 26, 2013 4:58 pm

Maxus wrote:A buddy told me about Project M. Which is a serious hardcore effort to rebalance Brawl. And bring in some other characters and stages.

Works by plugging an SD card into the wii, apparently. A link, just to be helpful.

Project M is amazing; I've been playing it occasionally for about two years now. Has all the polish and attention to detail that always characterized the Smash series.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Tue Nov 26, 2013 5:57 pm

Brawl always bothered me because of the tabletop justifications. A lot of the 'balancing' was retarded.

Their explicit reason for making Ganondorf even slower and making his running animation so stiff is 'he's a middle-aged man'.

Likewise, Lucario had a nice idea--get stronger in a tight spot--but then they went "oh noez, he could be the heaviest hitter! So we're going to make him freakin' nothing until he gets significant damage and then he can be a middleweight/heavyweight character. Who goes flying on a solid hit."

And that's the exact same kinda of bullshit reasoning that ends up with dumbass tabletop classes and races.

Longes · Post by **Longes** » Wed Nov 27, 2013 5:47 am

OgreBattle wrote: there's no good reason to wield a katana in two hands, because it's mostly dex based so that's going to be a dual wielding build anyways.

Well, IRL katana is dex based, because it's a crappy weapon that needs to be used in a specific way to avoid breaking it. And dual-wielding two long swords is a stupid idea.

I wish gaming media were more objective, instead of being a line of whores standing ready to blow AAA releases (Ultima 9, Bioshock 2, Call of Duty, Mass Effect 3 - I'm looking at you.)

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Thu Nov 28, 2013 5:51 pm

I was bitterly disappointed to find out that the Elder Scrolls games canonically include werecrocodiles and werebears and the like, but even with the dedicated "Spooky Shit" DLC Dawnguard dedicated to giving vampires and lycanthropes more badass options, Argonians and Khajit turn into werewolves rather than werecrocs and werecats.

I would require very little persuasion to bait random fools into coming near the water, where my werecrocodile Argonian would be waiting to drag someone in and pull their head off.

Darth Rabbitt · Post by **Darth Rabbitt** » Thu Nov 28, 2013 6:03 pm

Yeah, Dawnguard was kind of eh.

Personally, I was more disappointed that there was no big "fight the Thalmor" DLC; they really seemed to be gearing up towards that.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Fri Nov 29, 2013 3:13 am

I liked the treatment of vampires. Hell, I liked a lot of stuff in Dawnguard. Just, yeah. Werecrocs would have been cool.

And I'm with you there; the Thalmor are people you love to hate.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Fri Nov 29, 2013 4:31 am

I assume they will be the big bad for a large part of the MMO, but I don't actually know when that is or anything, so maybe it is a past version.

Voss · Post by **Voss** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 7:07 am

Kaelik wrote:I assume they will be the big bad for a large part of the MMO, but I don't actually know when that is or anything, so maybe it is a past version.

Its ~1000 years before, and in theory they aren't the same group, exactly. Or something. But the wacky interactive map they tossed up makes the high elves sounds like irredeemably racist bastards. Dunmer and Bretons sound like less racist bastards for their own factions, with the Redguards and Nords getting at least some respect. But the cats, lizards and orcs are pretty clearly at the bottom of the pecking order in a box marked 'slaves (even if we don't call them that anymore)'
http://elderscrollsonline.com/en/news/p ... of-tamriel

(Bonus for going after the furry market with high elf/cat person marriages, even if the horribly racist high elf family threatens to disown and murder them both- one of the perky interactive points in Greenshade)

Zenimax is going to be milking ESO pretty hard, and I'm reasonably certain a lot of people are going to be terribly disappointed by it. Rather than the Elder Scrolls series meets grandiose PvP goals they're trying to drum up in the PR, it looks like it is going to turn out to be the GW2 WvW(vW) zergfest in one corner, and a fairly generic action mmo with a shitty storyline in the other, and they don't match (or even meet up) all that well. Oh, and a dash of ES 'flavor' splashed on for the lore junkies.

The crying, at least, will be fun to watch. And a F2P transition in 6-9 months.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 4:20 pm

Yeah, I'll try it out, but I definitely expect ESO to be worse than other ES games because it is trying to be a generic MMO instead of literally just the 10 ES games packed into one, where most of the NPCs are replaced with PCs, which is what it would have to be to any good.

Seriously, could you imagine Elderscrolls across the entire world where all th secret cults bent on destroying the world by raising Daedra X where actually completely populated by PCs doing the stuff they were told to do by books found in the world. That would be way cooler than another MMO.

Basically, you need to make the game Elderscrolls, but have no chosen 1 dragonborn/neverine/whatever you were called in oblivion, and instead have evereyone doing both sides of the save/kill the world. And all the different kill the world people would be fighting each other too.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 4:48 pm

In Oblivion, the player character was just called the Champion of Cyrodiil. It's really dull.

DSMatticus · Post by **DSMatticus** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 4:57 pm

The Elder Scroll series' strengths have always been 1) open world that doesn't hold your hand or, worse, drag you around on a leash, 2) fairly open-ended item/ability customization subsystems," and 3) looore. Its weakness has always been "balance? hahahahahahahaehahuahueuheuheuheuhehue."

MMO's, on the other hand, are skinner boxes with a competitive element tacked on. They are deceptively linear (level-zoned for your reward scheduling convenience), inflexible (because competitive), and require balance. The only thing that survives the translation from the typical ES game to an MMO is the lore. And let's be honest: even their lore is pretty hit and miss. I'm 99% sure that their reputation for impressive lore is just them riding Morrowind's coattails. Oblivion's was okay, and Skyrim's was ass.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 6:16 pm

DSMatticus wrote:I'm 99% sure that their reputation for impressive lore is just them riding Morrowind's coattails. Oblivion's was okay, and Skyrim's was ass.

There are some decent small parts hidden inside Skyrim and Oblivion, but no more than any other game. I think you are right that it is just getting Morrowind really really right, and riding the reputation.

rampaging-poet · Post by **rampaging-poet** » Sat Nov 30, 2013 10:56 pm

I wish Borderlands 2 would let you start a new game at Level 10 in Sanctuary instead of having to replay the first two hours of the game every time you want to try a new character. Seriously, if I've beaten the game I've already seen the story and just want to play with some new toys. Sitting through Claptrap's dialogue again is not why I decided to play a Pyscho.

Meikle641 · Post by **Meikle641** » Sun Dec 01, 2013 4:49 am

rampaging-poet wrote:I wish Borderlands 2 would let you start a new game at Level 10 in Sanctuary instead of having to replay the first two hours of the game every time you want to try a new character. Seriously, if I've beaten the game I've already seen the story and just want to play with some new toys. Sitting through Claptrap's dialogue again is not why I decided to play a Pyscho.

This. Holy fuck, this.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Sun Dec 01, 2013 5:38 am

The Ultimate mode lets you start in Liar's berg on the hill overlooking the town.

But yeah. Pretty good idea there

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sun Dec 01, 2013 6:49 pm

I wish there was a way to combine Megaman Battle Network's fighting system with Megaman Star Force's plot and characterization minus Hyde, Luna, and Solo, holy shit.

I wish that there was a sequel to the original Final Fantasy Tactics which involved Ramza either exploring the netherworld (if you buy the interpretation that he kacked it) or another non-Ivalice continent (if you buy the interpretation that he didn't).

I wish that Bravely Default: Flying Fairy didn't have its male protagonists be utter dorks. The game looks amazing aside from Tiz and Ringabell. Yes, those are their names.

I wish that the Kingdom Hearts franchise didn't rely on coasting and fanfic plot spackle so fucking much. I consider KH2 the pinnacle of the series and the various remakes and spinoffs from 'amusing, but not awesome' (Birth by Sleep) to disappointing (Dream Drop Distance) to terrible (everything else). I don't even care much for KH1 or Chain of Memories. Why do I even give a shit about this franchise.

I wish that hentai games (or jRPGs in general) didn't abandon that rounded, heavy-lined pixel art look that you saw in games from the 80s-90s. You know, shit like Knights of Xentar, Runaway City, Time Stripper Mako, soforth. Hell, I just miss the pre-Cowboy Bebop linework and coloration in general. Not that I think that the current era is worse because there are still some amazing sequences, I just wish that it didn't go away.

I wish that Apollo Justice never happened. Or alternatively, I wish that particular game was done a bit differently. Phoenix Wright's disbarment should've either lasted a shorter period of time or that there should have been more time between AA3 and AA4 so we could have some interquel adventures. On the plus side, the canon lock did give us the Ace Attorney: Miles Edgeworth games which I consider superior to any of the mainline Ace Attorney games.

I really wish that Final Fantasy 4: The After Years had some more fucking thought put into the game other than being a nostalgia cash-in. The game really needed a lot more new mechanics/classes/game effects. Or at the very least more character interactions. The final chapter of the game is a fucking travesty. Also, the cosmic retcon at the end of that game is one that -- while I don't object to the general idea -- feels so fanficcy and out-of-nowhere that I don't blame anyone for declaring that it raped their childhood.

Shrapnel · Post by **Shrapnel** » Mon Dec 02, 2013 12:21 am

I wish Megaman X8 difficulty wasn't all over the place. In some places, it's laughably easy, or at least as easy as a Megaman game gets, and in some others (FUCKING GRAVITY ANT DUDE STAGE) it makes you want to find Keiji Inafune and force him to sit in cold water and think about what he did while beating the shit out of the level designer.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Mon Dec 02, 2013 12:46 am

Kaelik wrote:Basically, you need to make the game Elderscrolls, but have no chosen 1 dragonborn/neverine/whatever you were called in oblivion, and instead have evereyone doing both sides of the save/kill the world. And all the different kill the world people would be fighting each other too.

And the plot basically moving forward based on the actual things that players do, causing things other players have to respond to? Even non-MMO players would be all over that.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Mon Dec 02, 2013 1:24 am

Koumei wrote:And the plot basically moving forward based on the actual things that players do, causing things other players have to respond to? Even non-MMO players would be all over that.

Yes, except that fundamentally, designers have no fundamental trust in players to do things unless they are lead by the hand. Which is bullshit, and which is why every game has to be WoW hand holding quests that do nothing, and never ever an actual open world. Because you know, freedom would confuse people who like Elder Scrolls games. After Morrowind, how could I adapt to not being led by the hand through successively higher leveled enemies?