Tables and Ladders and Chairs, oh my! Improvised Weapons

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 12:47 am

Because I think it's going to become relevant. Jot it down to ESP or something.

A note on wooden improvised weapons: they're not actually built for the purpose of caving people's heads in. If ever a wooden improvised weapon hits a target that has more Damage Reduction or Hardness than its own Hardness, the difference is applied as damage to it - the target still takes any damage that is rolled. This will eventually result in such items shattering, which is awesome but annoying.

Wooden Chair/Stool:
This is treated as a Greatclub in every way, save that it can also be used as a Small Wooden Shield - you get to choose on any given round what you'd like to treat it as! It can also be thrown, with range increments of ten feet, because it's not very aerodynamic.

A massive throne is a chair, except sized for a Large or Huge character.

Barrels, Crates and Metal Drums:
Wow, another Greatclub! These have a 15' range increment when thrown, and the barrels and drums can also be rolled in a Line for a special trip attack: make a Trip attempt at the first target in the area. If it successfully trips them, it keeps going. It can keep doing this until it fails (and thus stops) or hits an object. People can avoid the whole Tripping process with a DC 15 Reflex Save or Jump Check.

Steel Folding Chairs:
Who would have thought they existed back then, right? Again, it's just a Greatclub, but it can be used in a Grapple with no penalty. Furthermore, because of the way you drive it into their throat or fold it over their head and slam it shut, it is extra deadly in a Grapple, with a Critical value of 18-20/x3.

Tables:
Wielding one is hard - a normal table is basically a Greatclub for a Huge character. Additionally, it can be used as a Tower Shield, but as with chairs, you have to choose each round which to use it as.

When making a successful Trip attempt against a foe, if there is a Table adjacent to either of you or in the same square, you can put them through the table: as long as your Trip roll is equal to or greater than their Trip-Resisting roll plus the Hardness of the table. This smashes the table, but deals damage as though you had hit them with the table itself. It will forever be a mystery why this hurts more than just throwing them onto the stone floor without the table breaking their fall.

Ladders:
A ladder is a Ranseur that deals Bludgeoning damage. Also, you can use it to climb things!

Crowbar/Prybar:
Depending on the length, it is either a Quarterstaff or a Baton/Club. It gains a +2 bonus when used to Disarm a foe.

Nailbat:
This is less improvised, as someone has taken the time to weaponise it. Well, further. It's a stick with one or more nails in it. It's a Club, but the damage is Bludgeoning and Piercing, and you can use special wooden materials and special metal materials if you want. There is an alternative, wrapping the bat in razorwire. This makes it Bludgeoning and Slashing.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 2:08 am

Handy stuff. I like the barrels.

Reminds me:

Power Folding Chair

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 4:52 am

Handy. I'm really glad that almost all of those things come in varieties which can be "opened."

Conceivable a nailbat could count as a morningstar.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 5:37 am

For Fire Trap, you'd be better off duct taping Fire Trapped flasks to them. After all, there's no guarantee that they'll smash "open" over a foe's head. That said, you might find a stash of fluorescent tubes at some point. NJPW tends to use mountains of those, they're like melee flasks.

Count Arioch the 28th · Thu Mar 14, 2013 5:43 am

The nail bat was the best weapon in FF7. Anything that tells yu otherwise is lying to you.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 6:08 am

Fire-trapped folding chair- goes off when you hold it by the back and hit someone so their head opens it.

Fire-trapped leaved table- goes off when you smash someone through it, opening the middle that would extend for an insert.

Fire-trapped barrel- ok, you have to hope they actually break it.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 10:01 am

Good point on the chairs and tables. Now it's up to you to carry them around, but it's not like nobody furnishes their homes/lairs/towers.

Of course, I could wander around my whole house, going "Oh, that item!" but I covered the proper wrestling related ones there. But a ladle would basically work as a mace, a spatula as a hand axe, a hatstand as a staff that is also a tripping/disarming weapon and so on.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 6:53 pm

I'll probably spend some of my 3000 gold for non-magical stuff on a cart and some folding chairs or something. Part of the reason I'm liking a three level dip of Jester for a luchadore so much is the spell Unseen Servant to act as ringside help.

edit: right, tower. Ok, maybe I should get a bag of holding or something. What level item would that be?

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:59 pm

That's a Minor Ability. You still get the scaling effect, so you're carrying a sack that makes you more agile or sexy or whatever.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Fri Mar 15, 2013 4:16 am

This makes it tempting to actually make it a mask of storing...

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Fri Mar 15, 2013 4:52 am

"Hold on, guys, let me find the spear...HURRRRRK. Okay, here it is. Might wanna wipe it off, though."

I saw an anime once where the good guys had a minor helper monster-girl. Some Japanese demon thing who'd swallow stuff to store it.

And when they wanted it back, the camera switched to behind her, a lot of freaked-out expressions happened, and she'd hork it up.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:04 am

Hey, the other idea is Speedo of Holding.