Authored by avanturist of auto.ru, translated by
that guy, typos corrected by yours truly.
The United States of Absinthe, or The Origins of the Crisis.
"...I will explain to you in very simple terms what was the driving force behind the crisis.
Imagine that we - that is, me, you, and Chronoscopist (auto.ru forum regular --
SM) - were flying across the Pacific. During the flight we had too much absinthe, got drunk, started a fight and in the process tore the toilet door off its hinges. As a result, they threw us off the plane over into the ocean through the emergency exit. Fortunately, not too far from the landing spot there was a small unnamed Polynesian island.
When we reached the shore, we had a brief discussion and decided to treat the island as a new independent state that we called the United States of Absinthe (USA for short).
It goes without saying that when they were throwing us off the plane they did not give us our baggage. So, all tangible and intangible assets that we had consisted of only the toilet door that you'd managed to swipe. Moreover, despite the absinthe, you happened to be quite thrifty, since you had discovered in your wallet a $100 bill. Therefore, in our USA we had non-financial assets, that is the door, as well as financial assets, consisting of all of our money - the $100 bill. These were also all of our savings. Since we have nothing else, one could say that we had material goods (the door), backed by the money supply in the amount of $100. In other words, our door cost $100.
After we had sobered up a little, we decided that we should somehow settle down. It turned out that the quickest of us all was Chronoscopist who announced that he was going to establish a bank and ready to accept any money that the people of the USA may have into savings accounts at the annual interest rate of 3%; the guy simply could not sit idle.
You gave him $100, and he wrote in his notebook under the title "Liabilities -> Deposits": $100. But I didn't want to be a fool, - I didn't investigate financial pyramids and Ponzi schemes for so long for nothing, - I did know how to take both the door and the $100. I offered to lend the $100 to me with a 5% annual interest rate. Then I tore off a page from my notebook where I wrote: "Financial Obligation", and below it: "$100, 5% per annum". You felt that you got lucky, took the money from Chronoscopist who got really upset and gave it to me in exchange for the "Financial Obligation". I took the $100 and deposited it back to the bank, which cheered up Chronoscopist.
This could have been the end of our financial operation, after which we could have turned to something useful, for example, - looking for food. But you know me - I'm a restless financial genius, I'm not interested in diving for oysters or climbing the palm trees in search for coconuts. Instead, I went for a walk around our island, which was 50 steps long and 30 steps wide, and in the process I thought of a fantastic financial combination. I came to you and proposed to make an additional 1% out of thin air. The idea was to apply for a loan with 4% interest rate at the Chronoscopist Bank and purchase one "Financial Obligation" with 5% interest rate from me.
Following this operation, I immediately created a second "Financial Obligation" (simply by writing on another page from my notebook: "Financial Obligation", and below it: "$100, 5% per annum") and waved it in front of you. You didn't think long and ran to the Chronoscopist Bank and borrowed $100 using the first "Financial Obligation" as collateral. The money was there, for I deposited the $100 to the Chronoscopist Bank. Next, you gave me the borrowed $100 and stuffed the second "Financial Obligation" into your wallet. You became the owner of two "Financial Obligations" of mine for $200 total, while I deposited back the $100 to the Chronoscopist Bank, where I accumulated $200. Chronoscopist couldn't be happier - the lending/borrowing business began!
You think that was it? Fat chance, - I had already written up a third "Financial Obligation" for you. You ran to the Chronoscopist Bank and borrowed more money using the second "Financial Obligation" as collateral. Towards the evening, having run back and forth with the $100 bill and used up all the pages from my notebook, we had the following situation. You had "Financial Obligations" of mine worth $5000, while I had $5000 deposited into the Chronoscopist Bank. At that moment I felt it was the time to take over your door, and so I offered to buy it from you for $100. But you didn't wish to sell it so cheaply: there was only one door on the island. So you asked $1000 for it. Well, what could I do? There was only one door, so $1000 sounded like a fair price. Besides I had $5000 in the Chronoscopist Bank. So, I used up the last page from my notebook to authorize a transaction of $1000 from my account to yours and took your door.
If we let an American economist with a Harvard diploma analyze our transactions he or she would inform us that our USA had material goods (the door) worth $1000 and financial assets in the amount of $10000 in the form of "Financial Obligations" and bank deposits. Therefore the tangible assets had increased in value 55 times in the course of one day. On the other hand, someone less sophisticated and educated would say that we were three idiots, since we had one door and $100 at the beginning and nothing had changed after all those "financial transactions", - moreover, we should have spent our time looking for coconuts instead of running back and forth with pages torn off my notebook. You decide who is right.
Now you understand what is behind "real estate prices are going up", - be it in the USA, Japan or Russia.
Addendum by
that guy.
If we continued our story and followed what happened afterwards, we would see that when it came to paying back the loans issued by the Chronoscopist Bank, it would turn out that you didn't have any liquid assets (cash, that is) and so couldn't pay them back. As a result all of the "Financial Obligations" used as collateral would have been taken over by the Chronoscopist Bank. However, since I also had no money, Chronoscopist got himself into real trouble, since all the "Financial Obligations" would be worth nothing because I defaulted on my obligations. In turn, the door would have been taken by the Chronoscopist Bank (unless it had already been used up as firewood). As a result we would have had the Island Financial Crisis with the only outcome that the only material asset on the island would have been taken away from its owner.
In conclusion, I'd like to point out that the GDP of USAbsinthe has grown by the end of the day from $0 to $1000. Moreover, if I managed to sell the door to Chronoscopist for $2000 the next day, the GDP of the USA would have been $3000, that is the growth of 200% overnight! And all this while not a single coconut has been gathered...