News that makes us laugh, cry, or both

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Wed May 06, 2009 6:36 am

Unless those bibles are edible. Hey, it was one of the few things the Imperium got right, and they're already showing remarkable similarities in the humanitarian approach. They should totally send edible bibles out to starving people, so they can either chow down or read-then-eat.

Although I suppose the cost involved would be better put towards simply sending much more food, perhaps some medical aid, and just a printed "God loves you" card.

ckafrica · Post by **ckafrica** » Sat May 09, 2009 4:50 am

Obama eats dijon on a burger

I am mystified that this is even news (though dijon obviously the right choice; french's shit in a bottle) but the fact that it was a featured story on yahoo if seriously fucking ridiculous.

I seriously wish people would simple stop dignifying fox news antics with any form of recognition

You're mom's a ho on craigslist Priceless

Lich-loved this one's for you

Lich-Loved · Post by **Lich-Loved** » Sat May 09, 2009 4:10 pm

What a waste. What is the point if both participants are dead?

koz · Post by **koz** » Sun May 10, 2009 12:03 am

Lich-Loved wrote:What a waste. What is the point if both participants are dead?

It's art.

ckafrica · Post by **ckafrica** » Sun May 10, 2009 3:02 am

Lich-Loved wrote:What a waste. What is the point if both participants are dead?

Would you prefer it if one of them were alive!?!?!

I actually think his work is genius and don't see how placing cadavers in coital positions is offensive. I'm actually kind of curious what position he chose....

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Sun May 10, 2009 5:21 am

That sounds like Burger Hero, the guy in critical condition for shooting and killing an armed robber at a burger joint over the $20 in the cash register.

-Crissa

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sun May 10, 2009 11:29 am

I've always wondered; why do people burglarize fast food joints and convenience stores anyway? I'm not going to get into the socioeconomic/psychological reasons why they would decide to commit this crime in the first place, I'm just asking the basic question of targetting.

Surely there has to be something that's less risky than a bank and yet more rewarding than FF joints? Something like a television repair shop?

Absentminded_Wizard · Sun May 10, 2009 10:02 pm

I guess if all you're looking for is your next hit of crack, you don't need all that much money.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Sun May 10, 2009 10:59 pm

Fast food joints are a more common business type, but yes, burglaries like that happen to all sorts of businesses; type isn't really important.

If you have nothing, the contents of a change drawer will feed and drug you for the day, easily.

And really, that's usually the point of it.

-Crissa

Neeeek · Post by **Neeeek** » Mon May 11, 2009 3:26 am

Lago PARANOIA wrote:I've always wondered; why do people burglarize fast food joints and convenience stores anyway? I'm not going to get into the socioeconomic/psychological reasons why they would decide to commit this crime in the first place, I'm just asking the basic question of targetting.

Maybe they want free food to go along with the money.

ckafrica · Post by **ckafrica** » Mon May 11, 2009 5:21 am

Kenyan man sues over sex boycott
Having spent 2 months in Kenya, this doesn't surprise me. Sub-saharan men are some of the most sex crazed people I've ever met. And I live in SE Asia for god sake!!!

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Mon May 11, 2009 4:58 pm

Lago PARANOIA wrote:I've always wondered; why do people burglarize fast food joints and convenience stores anyway? I'm not going to get into the socioeconomic/psychological reasons why they would decide to commit this crime in the first place, I'm just asking the basic question of targetting.

Surely there has to be something that's less risky than a bank and yet more rewarding than FF joints? Something like a television repair shop?

Grocery Stores. Watch the take on a single line in Safeway. The register has more money than a bank teller. Less guards too. People who rob corner stores and taco bells do it because they think there's no guards there at all (and they are often right), people who rob banks do it because they are stupid.

-Username17

Meikle641 · Post by **Meikle641** » Mon May 11, 2009 5:57 pm

As far as I'm concerned, the sex boycott is going to lead to many unpleasant things. I don't think they thought it through all the way...

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Mon May 11, 2009 6:52 pm

Meikle641 wrote:As far as I'm concerned, the sex boycott is going to lead to many unpleasant things. I don't think they thought it through all the way...

Apparently it was declared a success and ended. And seriously, is it better to live in fear that if you ever tried to deny your husband sex he would rape you than to actually find out while making a stand?

Meikle641 · Post by **Meikle641** » Tue May 12, 2009 12:50 am

Who said anything about husbands? Last I'd heard they were trying to get all women to do this, even prostitutes. That itself sounds like a pretty risky thing, especially in a developing area.

But I haven't kept up on the subject, so what do I know?

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Tue May 12, 2009 2:47 am

Grocery stores tend to have more people and better surveillance cameras... And generally, they don't exist in inner city areas plagued with poverty. So you'd have to drive a bit to find one.

-Crissa

ckafrica · Post by **ckafrica** » Fri May 15, 2009 7:52 am

‘Superfood’ Promoted on Oprah’s Site Robs Amazon Poor of Staple

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Fri May 15, 2009 8:45 am

That stuff tastes terrible. Like butter oil mixed with really sour blueberries and then tainted with arsenic.

-Crissa

Caedrus · Post by **Caedrus** » Fri May 15, 2009 2:19 pm

FrankTrollman wrote:people who rob banks do it because they are stupid.

-Username17

For sure. "What do you mean I was caught on security tape? I wore the juice!"

No, sir, lemon juice doesn't make you invisible to security cameras. Sorry about that.

ckafrica wrote:I actually think his work is genius and don't see how placing cadavers in coital positions is offensive.

It is offensive because it is social taboo within Western culture and most people are, unfortunately, brainwashed by their respective enculturation.

Lich-Loved · Post by **Lich-Loved** » Tue May 19, 2009 2:31 am

Biden continues the gaffe-a-thon

Yeah yeah I know Bush was an idiot, but crap man Biden and Obama act like they are working toward beating his record on gaffes.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Tue May 19, 2009 7:44 am

Lich-Loved wrote:Biden continues the gaffe-a-thon

Yeah yeah I know Bush was an idiot, but crap man Biden and Obama act like they are working toward beating his record on gaffes.

Oh no they aren't. Frankly the bunker thing is an open secret and probably never should have been made in the first place. Because like Cheney's man-sized safe it doesn't make the country any safer and does make the government more distant and distrusting seeming of its own people. Frankly, having Biden laugh about that stuff openly is extremely reassuring.

If you want to see really good governance - Sonja Gandhi has been walking around Tamil Nadu and shaking the hands of random passersby. This during a time in which the LTTE is in its death throes as a military organization and Sri Lankan Tamils are being shelled in hospitals by the government there. That takes giant balls of steel, and doing it makes India a better place. Need I remind you that Tamil terrorists invented the suicide vest to kill her husband?

There's basically nothing that the Obama administration can do that would make the country as "less safe" as Rumsfeld's use of Christian Imagery to sell the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq as a Christian Crusade or the Bush administration's Refusal to deploy federal resources during the events surrounding Katrina. I mean, we're talking deliberate actions that directly cost the lives of thousands of Americans.

Obama could get reelected and decide to shoot a man in cold blood every single day of his remaining two terms in office and he still wouldn't rack up the death toll in American lives that Bush and Cheney totaled with their "gaffes." And that's without classifying 9/11 as an intelligence failure that they were culpable for. Which is itself a stretch because Cheney and Rumsfeld were the people who armed and trained Osama Bin Laden in the first place.

-Username17

Caedrus · Post by **Caedrus** » Tue May 19, 2009 9:05 am

Lich-Loved wrote:Biden continues the gaffe-a-thon

Yeah yeah I know Bush was an idiot, but crap man Biden and Obama act like they are working toward beating his record on gaffes.

You really are buying into that Fox propaganda about painting him as the king of gaffers? Let alone you adding "and Obama" onto there. I can listen to an Obama speech without constantly wanting to shoot myself. That alone is a massive improvement. I find it difficult to find an instance where Bush stringed together a few sentences that was not in some form a monumental failure of ethics, policy, the English language, or basic common sense. Let alone comparing Biden and Cheney. How the hell can you even COMPARE the "gaffs" of this administration, like the bunker comment (joking about the hideaway of Dick Cheney) to, say, revealing the identities of undercover agents? Or, I don't know, destroying all of America's hard-earned rapport with the rest of the world so that we have to pretend to be Canadians when traveling abroad? I don't really see how Biden's comment hurts anyone. In fact, I'm reassured to see a change from Cheney's extreme secrecy like censoring his home from Google Earth (they don't do that for the White House or anything). By contrast, the "gaffs" from the Bush-Cheney team actively hurt Americans and American interests (but always seem to be just dandy for Cheney's business partners...)

Seriously, stop listening to the Fox commentary and listen to what the politicians are actually saying and look at the events that are actually happening to form opinions about things. This is not the solution, LL

Lich-Loved · Post by **Lich-Loved** » Tue May 19, 2009 11:36 am

Caedrus wrote:Seriously, stop listening to the Fox commentary

I don't watch network news or any television at all really. I haven't seen 5 minutes of television in 2 weeks, save for some Spongebob episodes.

Caedrus wrote:Or, I don't know, destroying all of America's hard-earned rapport with the rest of the world so that we have to pretend to be Canadians when traveling abroad?

I travel abroad and don't have to do this. How odd. We must go to different places.

Caedrus · Post by **Caedrus** » Tue May 19, 2009 11:57 am

Lich-Loved wrote:
Caedrus wrote:Seriously, stop listening to the Fox commentary
I don't watch network news or any television at all really. I haven't seen 5 minutes of television in 2 weeks, save for some Spongebob episodes.

And yet you're buying their propaganda anyways. You don't have to be actually watching Fox on TV to be listening to their commentary and blindly absorbing their opinions. What you just read and linked is reporting a Fox report, and so you are in fact listening to and regurgitating Fox's propaganda about Biden as the king of gaffers.

Lich-Loved wrote:
Caedrus wrote:Or, I don't know, destroying all of America's hard-earned rapport with the rest of the world so that we have to pretend to be Canadians when traveling abroad?
I travel abroad and don't have to do this. How odd. We must go to different places.

So, you have no response to the key points either I or Frank raised and just want to nitpick the word "must" (and make some flimsy irrelevant comment about how you watch Spongebob). Nice. I'll make it easy for you: Ignore the second part of that sentence. Just "destroyed a lot of the goodwill we built up with the rest of the world."

Lich-Loved · Post by **Lich-Loved** » Tue May 19, 2009 12:04 pm

Caedrus wrote:And yet you're buying their propaganda anyways through a surrogate: slashdot.

Oh. My. Fucking. God. Did you just say that? Really? LOL. Slashdot is a technical journal, not a political one. Politics are by far a rare story there unless they somehow deal with technology. Not to mention that one can gain the same information from Yahoo news or any other portal with national news on the web. Wait wait, let me guess... in your blind desire to leave undisturbed the puddle of sperm Obama levied on your back you're claiming that slashdot as all publications that show your version of the godking in a less than favorable light, is a surrogate for fox news? Mop up dude, its just going to get stickier.

Caedrus wrote:So, you have no response to the key points either I or Frank raised

Not really. You see, my post was about how Obama and Biden have made a number of gaffes. Not political or policy mistakes, just plain ol' Bush-ism that are just as embarrassing as Bush's Bush-isms. This is News that Makes Me Laugh and is why I posted it here.

The two of you ignored my point to discuss a different topics, which while interesting and worthy of discussion, have nothing to do with my post. Both of you felt you had something to build off in my post, which I consider a Good Thing; new ideas are out and perhaps a new topic will spring up. However, I see no reason why I am obligated to respond to posts that are only obliquely related to mine.