The Australian Accent is Ass

Draco_Argentum · Post by **Draco_Argentum** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 9:38 am

I've been watching Farscape now that I have the whole thing so the stupid network can't fuck around and play it at shit times. Its a great show with one major flaw. Being an Australian show most of the actors are Australian. The accents of the supporting cast regularly have that horrible twang. It even slips into some of the main character's speech.

The moment Australian is placed next to a neutral accent it grates on my nerves, even though I don't notice it in person.

Vent over. Anyone else notice that their own accent is very distinct when placed next to the neutral one actors tend to use?

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 10:40 am

The Australian life is not often a thoroughly self examined one.

I imagine if most "Aussies" actually took a moment to realize how grating, nasal and ugly their accent is they might consider stopping with it already.

They just seriously don't know they have an accent. Just like you clearly haven't noticed how TV shows don't typically have "neutral" accents and what you consider "neutral" Australians would consider British or American.

Anyway, Farscape has a range of Australian (and New Zealand) accents. And even the American guy has clearly picked up a bit of the local taint. And it is at least as annoying as all the southern drawls that crop up in American TV and the damned indecipherable Scottish accents that keep appearing in British TV (I mean have you ever watched Taggart? IS THAT EVEN ENGLISH?)

Fortunately there are a wealth of Australian accent variations, largely sadly derived from the worst of British regional accents, but there are a FEW which aren't crap.

Here is a show about them. and if you thought the Farscape ones were bad even the opening of that one should terrify you.

Anyway. For those at home here is an excercise. How to make your own Authentic Australian Accent!

1) Talk at least 50% through your nose.

2) Clench your teeth. DO NOT MOVE THEM. You are allowed to move your lips and tongue, NOT YOUR TEETH.

3) Feel free to sort of lose track of consonants towards the end of words, remember in Australia the word Australia is pronounced "Aaastraya"

4) Everything you ever say has the upward rising inflection of a question.

That should get you well on your way to a solid rural NSW ozzie accent.

To emulate a softer Sydney type accent still don't move your teeth, but hold them slightly apart.

Silly Sydney siders, don't they know if you open your teeth it will let the flies in?

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 11:51 am

I've had British people tell me I sound English. I used to speak like a "pom", proper upper-class English. But I've dumbed it down a bit, and though I still sound British, mostly it's the kind that would apparently fit in somewhere around London, in the Southern areas.

Vnonymous · Post by **Vnonymous** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 12:09 pm

The Australian accent is a thing of beauty and subtlety, although I wouldn't expect a pom or a seppo to understand or appreciate it.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 12:15 pm

>sepo

I can't believe it. I mean, first we get the derogatory term for Americans (Yank), then we get the Cockney rhyming slang for it (septic. Septic tank: Yank), and now we have the Ausfailian bastardisation, where we have to add silly sounds to the end of words. Like the bikie problem - we can't take them seriously because of the silly name. "Oh, a bikie, he's coming at me with a knifey, now I'm in the morguey".

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 1:49 pm

DA wrote:Anyone else notice that their own accent is very distinct when placed next to the neutral one actors tend to use?

I'm a third generation California intelligencia. I speak the "neutral" accent that actors use. Except that I'm from Central California, not Northern California. So I use words like "Hella" and "Walk."

-Username17

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 1:57 pm

...walk? In what context? Unless you mean "like running but slower", in which case, what do Northerners say?

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 1:59 pm

Koumei wrote:...walk? In what context? Unless you mean "like running but slower", in which case, what do Northerners say?

People from LA, who speak "Hollywoodese" and thus speak the international language of mass media (which in turn makes them sound "neutral"), drive everywhere. I, as a Central Californian, use the word "walk." In sentences.

-Username17

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 2:38 pm

So you're saying that what sounds so strange from your mouth (in "neutral") is the fact that you could say "It's a short walk from the liquor store", and not "a short drive"?

I never thought it'd be such a big deal, but I guess it could be strange enough for people to notice.

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 2:39 pm

Huh. Having never been south of Monterey, I didn't realize that there are Californians that speak with a neutral accent.

And Hollywood is not the north. You might think that if all you know about geography you learned from Frank's crazy posts claiming that nobody walks anywhere in San Francisco [!], but you'd be wrong.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 2:45 pm

It's all I know about American geography. I'm better with a bunch of other countries. And Frank's crazy rants are funny, so I'm fine with any inaccuracy.

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 3:49 pm

Don't worry Komei, that just means that you know as much about American geography as the average American knows about the rest of the world. Also as much as the average American knows about America.

By the way, to all the Aussies on the board: As much as you might hate it, us United Stateseans and Canadians find your accent charming and/or studly.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 4:24 pm

That was supposed to say "Southern" California, which is where LA is. Not "Northern" California, which is where everything from San Francisco to Redding is bizarrely lumped. I hadn't even realized that I fucked that up. Sorry.

-Username17

virgil · Post by **virgil** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 4:45 pm

I have a light accent from Utah, which is not a commonly encountered one in Massachusetts nor Texas. I've been told it's similar to the mass media accent that Frank mentions.

Post by **fbmf** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 6:54 pm

When I met Frank in person, he said my Texas drawl was only apparent when I used any form of the verb "to do".

He was never able to satisfactorily explain, and, of course, I have lived in Texas all of my life, so I don't notice it.

Game on,
fbmf

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 7:09 pm

FrankTrollman wrote:That was supposed to say "Southern" California, which is where LA is. Not "Northern" California, which is where everything from San Francisco to Redding is bizarrely lumped. I hadn't even realized that I fucked that up. Sorry.

Ah, that makes sense. To be honest, I still can't believe that San Diego is considered "Northern California". Northern California should be centered somewhere around Arcata. At the very least, nothing south of the Bay.

Josh_Kablack · Post by **Josh_Kablack** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 9:17 pm

It ain't just dahn under, alla yinz iz just a buncha gyint jagovs whose tok funny annat.

FrankTrollman wrote:I'm a third generation California intelligencia. I speak the "neutral" accent that actors use. Except that I'm from Central California, not Northern California. So I use words like "Hella"

-Username17

Yay for the Metric System!!

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Sat Mar 13, 2010 10:03 pm

CatharzGodfoot wrote:
FrankTrollman wrote:That was supposed to say "Southern" California, which is where LA is. Not "Northern" California, which is where everything from San Francisco to Redding is bizarrely lumped. I hadn't even realized that I fucked that up. Sorry.
Ah, that makes sense. To be honest, I still can't believe that San Diego is considered "Northern California". Northern California should be centered somewhere around Arcata. At the very least, nothing south of the Bay.

Yes, San Diego is south of LA, so it is not part of Northern California.

Frank has told me I have an Oregon accent sometimes. I was born near LA, but learned to speak in Oregon.

-Crissa

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:43 am

Crissa wrote:
CatharzGodfoot wrote:
FrankTrollman wrote:That was supposed to say "Southern" California, which is where LA is. Not "Northern" California, which is where everything from San Francisco to Redding is bizarrely lumped. I hadn't even realized that I fucked that up. Sorry.
Ah, that makes sense. To be honest, I still can't believe that San Diego is considered "Northern California". Northern California should be centered somewhere around Arcata. At the very least, nothing south of the Bay.
Yes, San Diego is south of LA, so it is not part of Northern California.

This is me messing up and typing "Diego" when I mean "Jose".

Crissa wrote:Frank has told me I have an Oregon accent sometimes. I was born near LA, but learned to speak in Oregon.

I never noticed any accent in Oregon.

Ganbare Gincun · Post by **Ganbare Gincun** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 5:47 am

Unless your accent is so bad that it renders what you're trying to say into unintelligible gibberish, I really don't have a problem with it. *shrug*

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 6:09 am

CatharzGodfoot wrote:Don't worry Komei, that just means that you know as much about American geography as the average American knows about the rest of the world. Also as much as the average American knows about America.

By the way, to all the Aussies on the board: As much as you might hate it, us United Stateseans and Canadians find your accent charming and/or studly.

actually I tend to find it amusing. I find british accents charming, and I can't quite think of any accents I find studly with the possible exception of german...

The Lunatic Fringe · Post by **The Lunatic Fringe** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 9:20 am

CatharzGodfoot wrote:
Crissa wrote:Frank has told me I have an Oregon accent sometimes. I was born near LA, but learned to speak in Oregon.
I never noticed any accent in Oregon.

Accents, dialects, and registers are all covered by sociolinguistics, which should give you a hint as to why and how they form. Basically, you can get a new accent whenever you have a group the members of which interact largely with each other, rather than with the people over there (though, of course, "there" could be a socioeconomic, religious, or other non-physical difference).

So I, who live in Seattle, speak with a very similar accent to that of people living in other cities on the West coast, but not to that of people living in Eastern Washington. Thus, I don't notice an accent when I go to Portland, but do when I go to Spokane.

I am very tired right now, and am basically just writing whatever comes to mind, but the point is that Oregon, as an arbitrary administrative district should not be expected to have a uniform accent, but may very well have individual zones with separate accents. If you go to Portland, you probably wouldn't notice the existence of an Oregon accent.

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Sun Mar 14, 2010 10:29 am

CatharzGodfoot wrote:By the way, to all the Aussies on the board: As much as you might hate it, us United Stateseans and Canadians find your accent charming and/or studly.

That is again largely because the world seems to think we are made out of Paul Hogan and Kylie Minogue.

Or at a stretch, Barry McKenzie.

We aren't.

We're made of Kath and Kim.

And indeed worse than that which you WON'T find on the internet, TV or what have you. Even the Australian accents documentary only had fleeting moments of the really thick scary stuff.

PS. Those cheeses are bought in overpriced packets of like 6 or something, that statue would be only mildly more expensive if you crafted it out of foie gras. Supermarket foie gras admittedly...

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 12:00 am

Well, you can get them pretty cheap in bigger bags...

-Crissa

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 1:04 am

Maybe in some sort of lah-deh-dah imaginary metropolitan shopping utopia like Sydney.