Gibberish of the day!

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:20 am

I don't even know how this works. Floridan group works to ban contraception via the state constitution.

-Crissa

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:22 am

I could see using the whole "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" to try and give sperm and ova rights, but... well, even the most crack pot pro-life person doesn't think "life" starts with sex cells...

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:44 am

Prak_Anima wrote:I could see using the whole "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" to try and give sperm and ova rights, but... well, even the most crack pot pro-life person doesn't think "life" starts with sex cells...

You know... unfortunately... they do.

-Username17

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:44 am

Prak_Anima wrote:I could see using the whole "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" to try and give sperm and ova rights, but... well, even the most crack pot pro-life person doesn't think "life" starts with sex cells...

State constitution, not declaration of independence with no legal standing.

@Crissa. The short answer is it doesn't.

I assume they put some shit in the Con that says "Contraception is teh bads!" But it's not actually helpful, because Griswold and Roe still apply, and Constitutional imaginary privacy rights that were selectively incorporated by judicial review about the 14th amendment apply equally as forcefully to state constitutions as they do to state laws.

Unless they are attempting to give the Supreme Court a chance to overturn Roe V Wade, but frankly, the chances of that are small, and they could do the same shit by passing another law.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:14 am

I assume they elected to forget about the whole "If I have normal sex, then even if I do impregnate the woman, then that's one sperm that lives (more if the ova has divided before this and we get non-identical hexuplets or whatever) and the rest all die. If I don't have sex at all, or even beat off, then an equal number +1 still all die as my body recycles them."?

Maybe they like protecting sperm because they have so much in common: about one in a million manages to turn into a real person.

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Mon Sep 14, 2009 11:59 pm

So taken to the extreme then, this idea would mean that [male] masturbation is a crime, as well as having a period... Right?

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 12:18 am

You think the religious right approves of either of those acts or the kinds of people that commit them?

If so you haven't been paying attention to the religious right.

Hicks · Post by **Hicks** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 9:09 am

I'm about as "right" as they fall, politically, and I can honestly say that I absolutly approve of [male] masturbation, as well as my girlfriend having a period, just not both in the same room at the same time. She has to cut that out.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 9:41 am

Just as long as you understand that you're a heretic, then :)

Neeeek · Post by **Neeeek** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 9:54 am

Hicks wrote:I'm about as "right" as they fall, politically, and I can honestly say that I absolutly approve of [male] masturbation, as well as my girlfriend having a period, just not both in the same room at the same time. She has to cut that out.

You do know that nailing her when she's menstruating usually helps her with her pains, right? Like, sex is the best cure there is for cramps that doesn't have side effects.

Just saying.

Hicks · Post by **Hicks** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 10:00 am

Koumei wrote:Just as long as you understand that you're a heretic, then

A little heresy is a good thing; keeps you thinking and in the faith of the immortal god emporer. But if the inquisition asks, you didn't hear it from me...

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Tue Sep 15, 2009 6:33 pm

More gibberish. Apparently, not mentioning Red Dawn until paragraph 23 and deigning to mention To Wong Foo is horribly slanted coverage.

Newsbuster's [url=http://newsbusters.org/blogs/tim-graham/2009/09/15/wapo-patrick-swayze-obit-gets-his-drag-queen-movie-red-dawn wrote:Tim Graham[/url]][The Washington Post's] obituary for Patrick Swayze begins obviously by noting his big hits "Ghost" and "Dirty Dancing," but doesn't get to "Red Dawn" until paragraph 23. Even then, Bernstein wrongly suggests he had a supporting role.

My spouse has a betting pool on how long until they start to blame Obama for his death, being as he's an icon to the winger set.

-Crissa

NativeJovian · Post by **NativeJovian** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 1:47 am

Hicks wrote:I absolutly approve of [male] masturbation

But no masturbating for chicks?

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 1:58 am

Native Jovian wrote:But no masturbating for chicks?

I can't speak for Hicks, but the reason I put a specification in there is that female masturbation doesn't generally involve wasting reproductive material, so it wouldn't be touched on by this new idiocy (in theory).

The only reason why I, personally, disapprove of masturbation is that it's a waste of valuable time when I could be having sex instead.

Neeek wrote:You do know that nailing her when she's menstruating usually helps her with her pains, right? Like, sex is the best cure there is for cramps that doesn't have side effects.

QFT

Hicks · Post by **Hicks** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 2:44 am

Maj wrote:Truth.

There is nothing but turth in the quote above.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 2:49 am

Maj wrote: The only reason why I, personally, disapprove of masturbation is that it's a waste of valuable time when I could be having sex instead.

This is possibly the only valid reason to disapprove*. Well done.

*And obviously doesn't apply to your partner being away/not in the mood/highly infectious, or the person in question being a lonely, miserable old cow.

tzor · Post by **tzor** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 1:54 pm

Maj wrote:I can't speak for Hicks, but the reason I put a specification in there is that female masturbation doesn't generally involve wasting reproductive material, ...

I don’t want to nit pick, but the whole system is designed for waste. The average life of a sperm even within the male is only a matter of days (this wasn’t as easy as you might think to try to Google, most sources only care about sperm life after ejaculation). Depending on the environment the life span outside the male is minutes to hours to days.

Despite the Monty Python song “every sperm is sacred,” the Catholic Church has always considered masturbation as an offense against chastity; which is really more of a proper attitude towards procreation in general.

Count Arioch the 28th · Wed Sep 16, 2009 2:08 pm

I don't understand how that's possible. One time during a deep depression, I didn't achieve any sort of release for a period of about two months and got painfully backed up. I honestly don't understand how a man can go great lengths of time and not be in constant agony.

I have no opinions on female masturbation. They can do whatever the hell they want, they obviously don't want anything to do with me regardless.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 8:05 pm

That's why we know they're lying or delusional, Count. It's also possible for a male to have relief while asleep, too.

-Crissa

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 10:06 pm

I think you may find, remarkably the "nocturnal emissions" are also frowned upon by the religious right.

I also love how Tzor is pretending to be reasonable by disapproving of masturbation on a "chastity" basis instead. "I'm more sane because I have even less of a reason behind my disapproval!" That's hilarious.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 10:27 pm

tzor didn't frame that sentence in that his opinion, but of the Catholic Church, which we know isn't in the business of much reality when it comes to human reproduction.

-Crissa

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 10:28 pm

Crissa wrote:That's why we know they're lying or delusional, Count. It's also possible for a male to have relief while asleep, too.

-Crissa

No, he's seriously right. The backup isn't sperm, it's other seminal fluids hanging out in the seminal vesicle. It can cause prostate problems if it isn't 'treated'.

Maj · Post by **Maj** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 10:31 pm

Count Arioch wrote:I didn't achieve any sort of release for a period of about two months and got painfully backed up.

If I get turned on for any major length of time (more than an hour or two), and I don't get relief, I get some serious cramps. I have no idea why, but I do.

tzor wrote:I don’t want to nit pick, but the whole system is designed for waste.

There's a lot of truth in that, but the point remains that women can't lose eggs by masturbating.

tzor wrote:Despite the Monty Python song “every sperm is sacred,” the Catholic Church has always considered masturbation as an offense against chastity; which is really more of a proper attitude towards procreation in general.

Seeing as how I was not raised Catholic, I have no idea about the Church's view on things... If the issue with masturbation is actually chastity, not wasting of reproductive material, then what's the deal with contraception?

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 11:18 pm

Because contraception reduces the obvious consequence of heterosexual intercourse--namely, pregnancy. The threat of pregnancy is enough to shy away enough people who would've otherwise had sex if there's no way to reduce it.

Thus the church achieves its goals of having less people fucking.

This stance of course creates a lot of other problems like, oh, AIDs and unwanted/unsupported pregnancies. Because people love to have sex and the threat of death and loss of livelihood will only deter a fraction of the people. But if you sufficiently lack empathy then hundreds of thousands of people getting HIV is a small price to pay to stop people from having sex, eh?

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Sep 16, 2009 11:50 pm

No, maj, the female system merely bleeds them out constantly or consistently, depending upon who you ask.

-Crissa